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During the day, it is okay to stay inside and ask about someone's illness; at night, it is okay to stay outside and express condolences. Therefore, a gentleman does not stay outside unless there is a major cause; he does not stay inside day and night unless he is in Qi or is not ill.
Confucius stood with his disciples, bowed and tilted his head to the right, and the two disciples also tilted their heads to the right. Confucius said, "You two are fond of learning, but I am sad because my sister is dead." The two disciples all tilted their heads to the left.
Wang Dongting was the chief clerk of Xuanwu. One spring day, he and his brothers Shitou rode on horseback to the suburbs. Shi Yan and his fellow travelers marched together. Only one person from Dongting was always in front, and he could sense it several dozen steps away, but no one could understand it. Shitou and others were tired, and soon the imperial carriage returned. Everyone seemed to be an official, except Dongting Yiyi who was standing in front. His understanding is so quick.
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
In the past, the Youyu clan valued virtue and respected age.
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