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When Lady Xie was teaching her son, she asked the tutor, "How come I didn't see you teaching my son for the first time?" The tutor replied, "I always teach my son myself."
Eat for three days, bathe for three months, and practice after a period of time, so that destruction does not destroy nature, and death does not hurt life. Mourning does not exceed three years, and mourning clothes do not repair, and graves are not built; on auspicious days, white harps are played to inform the people of the end; this is a rule of moderation. From serving the father to serving the mother, and love the same. There is no two suns in the sky, no two kings on earth, no two rulers in a country, no two masters in a family, and they are all governed by one. Therefore, when the father is alive, the mother should mourn for the same period of mourning, which shows that there is no two masters.
The father offers sacrifices to the son and then orders the bride to go up, and the man goes before the woman. The son accepts the order and goes to the temple to greet the bride. The host sets up a banquet in the temple, and then greets the bride outside the door. The son-in-law enters with a goose, bows and yields to the gods, and then bows again to offer the goose, which is to receive it from his parents personally. . After the wedding, the bride comes out in the carriage, and the husband hands over the reins, and the bridegroom rides three times. He waits outside the door first, and when the bride arrives, the husband bows to her and lets her in, and they eat together, and drink wine together, so as to unite the body and treat the people equally, and treat them with affection.
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
The host does not personally accept it. When receiving, he stands up, and when giving, he does not sit down. There are those who are upright in nature. When entering and saying goodbye, he says: "I say goodbye". When sitting, he says: "It's OK". There is only one person who puts up his shoes and puts on his shoes in the house. If there is an elder present, it is not OK. When asking about taste, he says: "Do you eat so and so?" When asking about the art of Taoism, he says: "Are you accustomed to so and so?" "Are you good at so and so?" Do not doubt yourself, do not measure the tools of the people, do not be reluctant to the big family, and do not criticize the heavy tools. Sweeping is called sweeping, and sweeping in front of the mat is called fighting; the mat is not to be beaten with a mane. Hold the dustpan and hold the hair. Do not ask twice. When asking about divination, he says: "Is it righteousness? Is it will?" If it is righteous, you can ask, but if it is will, you can't.
Taifu Xie and Wang Wendu went to see Xi Chao together, but as time went by and Wang had not yet arrived, he wanted to leave. Xie said: "Can't you bear it for a moment for your life?"
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