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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When Wang Xiaobo was traveling in Beijing, he came to his brother Wang Du's house and asked, "Which line in ancient poetry is the best?" Du thought for a moment but did not answer. Xiao Bo chanted, "'How can I not age quickly if I encounter things without a reason?' This line is good."
Liu Ling was always indulging in drinking and being unrestrained. Sometimes he would take off his clothes and walk naked in the house, and people would laugh at him. Ling said: "I use the heaven and earth as my building, and my house as my clothes. Why do you want to enter my army?"
Wang Dongting was the chief clerk of Xuanwu. One spring day, he and his brothers Shitou rode on horseback to the suburbs. Shi Yan and his fellow travelers marched together. Only one person from Dongting was always in front, and he could sense it several dozen steps away, but no one could understand it. Shitou and others were tired, and soon the imperial carriage returned. Everyone seemed to be an official, except Dongting Yiyi who was standing in front. His understanding is so quick.
When Wang Pingzi was sent out to be the governor of Jingzhou, Taiwei Wang and other wise men came to see him off promptly. At that time, there was a big tree in the courtyard, and there was a magpie's nest on it. Pingzi took off his clothes and towel, and went up the tree to pick the magpie. The cool clothes were caught on the branches and then taken off. When the magpie returned, he played with it, looking calm and composed, as if no one was around. The Taoist priest sat high above the Prime Minister and always lay beside him. When he saw Bian Ling, he changed his expression and said, "He is a man of etiquette."
When the emperor mourns for the princes, he wears a crown, a sash, and a black robe; some say: let the officials mourn for him, and do not use music or food. When the emperor mourns, the coffin is covered with a dragon carriage, and an axe is added to the coffin, and the house is covered with paint. This is the emperor's etiquette.
If you have worn a three-year-old white cap, you can replace it with the hemp of great merit; only the walking stick and shoes cannot be changed. When there is a death of parents, the merit is reduced, and when you are with your brother, you can wear a white cap. When you are with your brother, you are called Yang Tong Mou Fu, without a name, and it is a god. When you live separately, when you first hear about your brother's death, you can only cry in response. When you first wear hemp, you can wear a mourning belt. If you go to the funeral without wearing hemp, and the host has not yet worn mourning, you should wear it with the host if you are distant, and wear it with the host if you are close. , and the number of days of wearing the hemp belt and mourning clothes. When the master's concubine dies, the son shall be in charge of everything from mourning clothes to the linen auspicious ceremony. The funeral and sacrifice shall not be held in the main wife. The master shall not care for the servant concubine. When the queen dies, the concubine shall wear the party clothes of the queen. If the queen takes over, the concubine shall not wear the party clothes of the previous queen.
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