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When Duke Zhuang of Lu was buried, the coffin was not brought into the storehouse. After the scholars and officials finished crying, the hemp was not brought in.
A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.
If the ministers go out of the country privately, they must ask for permission. When they return, they must offer. If the scholars go out of the country privately, they must ask for permission; when they return, they must tell. If the king works hard for them, they will bow; if they ask about their travels, they will bow before answering. When a king leaves his country, he is stopped by saying, "How can you leave the altar of the country?" The ministers say, "How can you leave the ancestral temple?" The scholars say, "How can you leave the grave?" The king dies for the altar of the country, the ministers die for the people, and the scholars die for the system.
Yu Daoji said: "Although Lian Po and Lin Xiangru have been dead for thousands of years, they are still alive. Although Cao Tu and Li Zhi are still alive, they are as sad as the dead in the underworld. If everyone is like this, they can be ruled by tying ropes, but I am afraid that foxes and raccoons will eat them all."
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
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