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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
Wang Youjun had always looked down on Lantian, but Lantian's praise for him increased in his later years, which made Youjun particularly dissatisfied. Lantian was in danger in Kuaiji, so he stopped at Shanyin to hold funerals. Youjun was in charge of the county and repeatedly expressed his condolences, but to no avail. Later he went to the gate and let in. The host was crying, so he did not go forward but left, humiliating him. As a result, a great rift between them arose. Later, Lantian was approaching Yangzhou. The Right Army was still in the county. When he first got the news, he sent a military officer to the court to request that Kuaiji be divided into Yuezhou. However, the messenger disobeyed the imperial order and was laughed at by the wise men of the time. Lantian secretly ordered his men to count all the illegal activities in the county, and since there was already a rift between them, he ordered them to deal with it themselves. Youjun then claimed illness and left the county, and died in indignation.
There are six ways to serve: one is to be close to relatives, two is to respect the elders, three is to name, four is to go in and out, five is to respect the elders, and six is to follow the service. There are six ways to serve: following relatives, following disciples, following with service but not with service, following without service but with service, following the heavy and then the light, and following the light and then the heavy.
What are the four spirits? The unicorn, the phoenix, the tortoise and the dragon are called the four spirits. Therefore, the dragon is used as livestock, so fish and tuna are not succumbed; the phoenix is used as livestock, so birds do not degenerate; the unicorn is used as livestock, so beasts do not go wild; the tortoise is used as livestock, so human nature is not lost. Therefore, the ancient kings held yarrow and tortoise, arranged sacrifices, buried silk, announced prayers and speeches, and established systems, so the country has rituals, officials have guards, things have duties, and rituals have order. Therefore, the ancient kings worried that the rituals would not reach the lower classes, so they offered sacrifices to the emperor in the suburbs to determine the position of heaven; they offered sacrifices to the gods in the country to arrange the benefits of the land; the ancestral temples were used to establish benevolence, the mountains and rivers were used to worship ghosts and gods, and the five sacrifices were used to establish affairs.
The Master said: "The moderation is the highest! Few people can keep it for long!"
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