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Zengzi said: "There are three kinds of filial piety: the greatest kind is to honor one's parents, the next is not to humiliate them, and the lowest is to be able to support them." Gong Mingyi asked Zengzi: "Master, can you be filial?" Zengzi said: "What are you talking about! What are you talking about! What a gentleman is filial to his parents is to anticipate their wishes and teach them the way. If you are a person who supports them directly, how can you be filial?" Zengzi said: "The body is the remains of the parents. How dare you treat the remains of the parents with disrespect? If you are not dignified in your residence, you are not filial; if you are not loyal to your lord, you are not filial; if you are not respectful in your office, you are not filial; if you are not good friends, you are not good friends. If one does not believe, it is not filial piety; if one is not brave in battle, it is not filial piety; if one fails to fulfill the five virtues, the disaster will come to one's parents, so how dare one not respect them? Heng Shu Tan Xiang, who tried to recommend him, was not filial piety, but nurturing. What a gentleman means by filial piety is that the people of the country say, "I am lucky to have a son!" This is what is called filial piety. The basic teaching of the masses is filial piety, and its practice is nurturing. Nurturing is possible, but respect is difficult; respect is possible, but peace is difficult; peace is possible, but death is difficult. After the parents are gone, if one conducts oneself carefully and does not bring bad reputation to the parents, it can be said that one can live to the end. A benevolent person is a person who is kind to this; a person who is polite is a person who is kind to this. The righteous is the one who follows this; the righteous is the one who is appropriate to this; the trustworthy is the one who trusts this; the strong is the one who is strong. Pleasure comes from following this, and punishment comes from the opposite. "Zeng Zi said: "Filial piety, if placed, can fill the heaven and earth; it can extend to the four seas and be applied to future generations without day or night. It can be extended to the East Sea, the West Sea, the South Sea, and the North Sea. The Book of Songs says: "From the west to the east, from the south to the north, there is no one who does not obey." This is what it means. "Zeng Zi said: "Trees should be cut down in due season, and birds should be raised. The beasts are killed at the right time. The Master said, "To cut down a tree or kill an beast at the wrong time is not filial piety." There are three kinds of filial piety: minor filial piety is to use strength, medium filial piety is to use labor, and great filial piety is to be diligent. Thinking of kindness and forgetting labor can be said to be using strength. Respecting benevolence and upholding righteousness can be said to be using labor. Giving generously and preparing things can be said to be diligent. When parents love you, you should be grateful and never forget; when parents hate you, you should be afraid but not complain; when parents make mistakes, you should advise them but not disobey; when parents are dead, you must ask for grain from benevolent people to offer them sacrifices. This is called the end of the ritual. "Le Zheng Zichun went down the hall and hurt his foot. He did not go out for several months and still looked worried. The disciples said, "Master, your foot has recovered, but you haven't gone out for several months. Why do you still look worried?" Le Zheng Zichun said, "Your question is good! Your question is good! I heard from Zengzi, and Zengzi heard from the Master that: 'What the heaven gives birth to, the earth raises, no one is greater than.' Parents give birth to their children intact, and children return to their children intact. This can be called filial piety. Not damaging their bodies, not dishonoring their bodies, can be called complete. Therefore, a gentleman dares not forget filial piety even when he walks. Now I have forgotten the way of filial piety, so I look worried. I dare not forget my parents when I take a step, and I dare not forget my parents when I speak. I dare not forget my parents when I take a step, so I don't take shortcuts, I don't go boating, and I dare not take the remains of my parents in danger. I dare not forget my parents when I speak, so I don't say bad words, and I don't say angry words back. Not dishonoring oneself, not humiliating one's parents, can be called filial piety."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Wang Ziyou and Zijing were both seriously ill, but Zijing died first. Ziyou asked his attendants, "Why haven't we heard any news? He is already dead!" He showed no sadness at all when he spoke. They asked for a sedan chair and came to the funeral, but did not cry. Zijing had always loved the zither, so he went straight in and sat on the coffin, took out Zijing's zither and played it. When the strings were out of tune, he threw it to the ground and said, "Zijing! Zijing! Both you and the zither are gone." He was in grief for a long time, and died more than a month later.
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