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When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
When following the teacher, I will not cross the road to talk to others. When I met the teacher on the road, I walked towards him, stood upright and bowed. If the teacher talks to him, he will respond; if the teacher doesn't talk to him, he will retreat.
Luo Junzhang was once at someone's house, and the host asked him to talk with the guests. He replied, "We have known each other for a long time, so I don't need to bother you again."
Zilu said, "How sad it is to be poor! There is nothing to take care of him when he is alive, and nothing to do with his death." Confucius said, "To eat beans and drink water to the fullest is filial piety; to hide one's head and body, to return to bury without a coffin, and to weigh the property is courtesy."
When Tao Gong was young, he worked as a fish weir official and once offered fish crucibles to his mother as a reward. The mother sealed the fish and gave it to the envoy, and wrote back to rebuke Kan, saying: "You are an official, and you use official goods to pay the bills. Not only is it of no benefit, but it also adds to my worries."
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