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The lowly should not mourn the noble, the young should not mourn the old, this is the etiquette. Only the emperor should be mourned by calling the heaven. The princes mourning each other is not etiquette.
When Guo Zhaozi's mother died, he asked Zi Zhang, "At the funeral and tomb, what positions should men and women take?" Zi Zhang said, "At the funeral of Si Tu Jingzi, Confucius was the prime minister, and men faced west and women faced east." He said, "Ah! No." He said, "At my funeral, Si was involved. You are responsible for it, the guests are guests, the host is the host--women and men all face west."
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
Duke Yu wanted to re-employ Zhou Zinan, but Zinan became even more stubborn in his refusal. Whenever Yu visited Zhou, Yu entered from the south gate and Zhou left from the back gate. Once, Yu arrived in a hurry and Zhou could not leave, so they stayed together all day. Yu asked Zhou for food. Zhou brought out vegetables, and Yu forced himself to eat. They were very happy. They talked about worldly affairs and agreed to recommend each other to share the responsibility of helping the world. After he entered the officialdom, he was promoted to the rank of general, 2,000 stones, but was not satisfied with it In the middle of the night he said with deep emotion: "A real man has been betrayed by Yu Yuangui!" After a sigh, he died of a rash on his back.
Zhang Cangwu was the ancestor of Zhang Ping. He once said to Ping’s father, “I am not as good as you.” Ping’s father did not understand why. Cangwu said, "You have a beautiful son." Ping was a few years old at that time. He put his hands together and said, "Old man, how can you tease your father with your son?"
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