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There are six ways to serve: one is to be close to relatives, two is to respect the elders, three is to name, four is to go in and out, five is to respect the elders, and six is to follow the service. There are six ways to serve: following relatives, following disciples, following with service but not with service, following without service but with service, following the heavy and then the light, and following the light and then the heavy.
The kind and gentle are the root of benevolence; the cautious and respectful are the place of benevolence; the generous are the work of benevolence; the generous are the ability of benevolence; the polite are the appearance of benevolence Talking is the expression of benevolence; singing is the harmony of benevolence; dispersing is the application of benevolence; Confucians have all of these, but they still dare not say benevolence. Their respect and humility are like this.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
It is the festival of a boy. The black cloth clothes are brocade-edged, the brocade belt, and the button brocade, and the hair is all red brocade. Boys do not wear fur or silk, shoes or silk, and do not wear mourning clothes. Listening to affairs does not require hemp. If there is no business, he will stand to the north of the host and see the teacher enter with others. Those who serve food to the teacher with different titles will offer sacrifices later and eat first. When the guest offers sacrifices, the host declines and says, "It is not enough to offer sacrifices." When the guest eats, the host declines with a sparse. If the host prepares his own sauce, the guest will clean it himself. In a room, one person who is not a guest should clean up. In a meal, one person should clean up. In banquets, women should not clean up. When eating dates, peaches, and plums, do not take the core. When offering melons, throw away the rings in the middle of the food. Those who eat fruits should eat after the gentlemen, and those who light the fire should eat before the gentlemen. In celebrations, do not congratulate unless the king gives gifts. Confucius ate at Ji's house, and did not refuse. He did not eat meat and ate.
Wang Gongyuan married the daughter of Zhuge Dan. After they entered the room and started talking, the king said to the woman, "You look humble, not like Gong Xiu at all!" The woman said, "A man cannot imitate Yan Yun, but let a woman compare herself to Ying Jie!"
Duke Huan said to his guests: "Ayuan is a man of virtue and words. If he were appointed as an official, he would be able to set an example for the officials. The court is misusing his talent."
Le Ling was good at speaking clearly but not good at writing. He was about to resign the post of Governor of Henan and asked Pan Yue to be his deputy. Pan Yun said, "You can do it. But it must satisfy your Majesty." Le Wei described why he was humble, with about 200 words to indicate his position. Pan Zhi became a famous writer because of his intricate and complex writing. People at that time all said: "If the music had not borrowed Pan's writing, and Pan had not taken the purpose of the music, it would not have been possible to achieve this."
The father and son of Yin Taichang of Jiangzuo were both able to reason, but they also had differences in their eloquence and taciturnity. When Yangzhou talked a lot, Taichang would say, "You should think more about my argument."
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