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Xu Yuan once visited Jianwen. It was a windy and calm night with a bright moon, so they composed music and talked in the room. Expressing one’s inner thoughts is Xu’s forte. The words are clear and graceful, more than usual. Although Jianwen and he had always been in sync, this encounter was even more regrettable. Unconsciously they knelt down and spoke with their hands, and the conversation lasted until almost dawn. Then he said: "Xuan Du has great talent and sentiment, so it is not easy to give him many compliments."
When a dog Zhongni kept died, he asked Zigong to bury it, saying, "I have heard that if you do not discard an old curtain, you will bury the horse; if you do not discard an old cover, you will bury the dog. I am poor and have no cover; I also gave him a mat at his fiefdom so that his head would not be sunk."
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
All the Ruan brothers were good at drinking. When Zhongrong and his clan members gathered together for a while, they no longer used ordinary cups to drink, but used large jars to hold wine, and they sat around and drank together. Sometimes a group of pigs came to drink, and they would go straight up and drink together.
Before leaving, Mr. Yu talked to Zhong about the future affairs and entrusted him with deep trust. Zhong said, "Whose fault is it when the pillars are broken and the rafters are falling?" Yu said, "Today's events cannot be discussed any more. You are the one who will restore the situation!" Zhong said, "I think you are worthy of being Xun Lin's father."
Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
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