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Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
Someone asked the military governor, "How good is Yin Hao in his talks?" He replied, "I can't beat others, but I can at least win the hearts of the people."
Someone asked General Yin Zhongjun: "Why does a general who is about to get a position dream of coffins and utensils, and a general who is about to get wealth dream of feces and dirt?" Yin said: "Officials are originally rotten and smelly, so a general who is about to get a position dreams of coffins and corpses; wealth is originally feces and dirt, so a general who is about to get a position dreams of dirt and dirt." People at that time thought that his name was untrue.
Taifu Xie was the horseman of Duke Huan's company. When Duke Huan went to see Xie, Xie was combing his hair and quickly took out his clothes and hat. Duke Huan said, "Why bother with this?" Then they stayed down and talked until nightfall. After he left, he said to his attendants, "Have you ever seen such a person?"
Wang Gong wanted to invite Jiang Lunu to be the chief secretary, so he went to Jiang in the morning, but Jiang was still in the tent. The king sat down, not daring to speak immediately. It took a long time before he got there, but Jiang didn't respond. He called for someone to bring him some wine, drank a bowl himself, and did not share any with the king. Wang laughed and said, "Why do I have to drink alone?" Jiang said, "Do you want to drink too?" He asked him to pour more wine for Wang. After Wang finished drinking, he was able to leave. Before leaving the house, Jiang sighed and said, "It is difficult for people to judge for themselves."
People at that time said of Ruan Sikuang: "He is not as strong as Youjun in spirit, not as elegant as Zhenchang, not as graceful as Zhongzu, not as thoughtful as Yuanyuan, but he has the beauty of all of them."
The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
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