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When hearing about the death, one cannot go to the funeral, so he cries to the utmost; when asked why, he cries to the utmost again. Then he takes his seat, ties his hair and exposes his clothes, dances, and wears a sash and a belt to take his seat, bows to the guest and returns to his seat, dances. When the guest leaves, the host bows and sees him off outside the door, and returns to his seat; if there are guests who arrive later, he bows to them and dances, and sees them off as before. When he cries again, he ties his hair and exposes his clothes, dances. When he cries for the third time, he ties his hair and exposes his clothes again and dances. After three days, he is in mourning. After the fifth time, he bows to the guest and sees him off as before. If he returns after the funeral, When the host goes to the tomb, he cries and dances, pulls his hair to the east and exposes his mourning clothes, bows to the guests and dances, sends the guests back to their seats, cries and mourns until he has finished his work, then removes his clothes, and does not cry at home. The host does not change his clothes when treating the host, cries with him, and does not dance. From the age of mourning below, the difference is that he does not wear mourning clothes.

The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.

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When Cai Hong went to Luoyang, the people of Luoyang asked him, "When the government was first established, the officials appointed officials to seek the talented and extraordinary in the humble and to recruit the wise and talented from the caves. You are a man of Wu and Chu, the survivors of the fallen countries. What special talents do you have to be selected?" Cai replied, "The pearls that shine in the night don't have to come from the Mengjin River; the jade that fits in the hand doesn't have to be mined from the Kunlun Mountain. Dayu was born in the Dongyi, and King Wen was born in the Xiqiang. Why should the saints and wise men stay in the same place? When King Wu defeated King Zhou and moved the stubborn people to Luoyi, could you be their descendants?"

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