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Ruan Guanglu lived in Dongshan, where he had nothing to do and was always content. Someone asked Wang Youjun about this, and Wang Youjun said, "This man is not afraid of favor or disgrace recently. Even the ancients who were in obscurity are no better than him."
A bundle of money: a bundle of five liang, two and five qian. When a woman meets her uncle and aunt, brothers, aunts and sisters, she should all stand in the hall, facing west and facing north, which means she has met them. When she meets her fathers, each goes to his own bed. Although a woman is not married, she will wear a hairpin at the age of twenty, and the ceremony will be performed. The woman will follow the ceremony. When she is married, she will curl her head.
When Wang Youjun saw Du Hongzhi, he sighed and said, "His face is as white as cream, his eyes are as white as lacquer. He is a man of gods and immortals." At that time, some people praised Wang Changshi for his appearance. Cai Gong said, "It's a pity that people haven't seen Du Hongzhi!"
In mourning of parents, after the funeral, one should cry for the deceased, eat simple food and drink water, and not eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the minor auspiciousness, one should eat vegetables and fruits; in the time of the major auspiciousness, one should eat soy sauce; in the middle of the month, one should mourn, and drink sweet wine during the mourning. Those who start drinking should drink sweet wine first. Those who start eating meat should eat dried meat first. In the case of parents' funeral, people live in a lean-to house, sleep on straw and a block of pillow, and do not wear mourning clothes; in the case of mourning of the first mourning period, people live in a whitened room, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; in the case of mourning of the second mourning period, people sleep on mats, and in the case of mourning of the third mourning period, people wear hemp and a bed. This is the way that grief is expressed in the place where one lives.
The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by respecting oneself?” Confucius replied, “When a gentleman speaks too much, the people will make excuses; when he acts too much, the people will make examples. If a gentleman does not speak too much and does not act too much, the people will respect him without being ordered. In this way, he can respect himself; if he can respect himself, he can complete his parents. ”The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by completing his parents?” Confucius replied, “A gentleman is a name for people. The people call him a son of a gentleman. This is to make their parents become gentlemen, and this is to complete their parents’ name!” Confucius then said, “In ancient times, the most important thing in governing was to love people. If you cannot love people, you cannot have your body; if you cannot have your body, you cannot be at peace with your land; if you cannot be at peace with your land, you cannot be happy with heaven; if you cannot be happy with heaven, you cannot complete your body.”
The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
Wang Da and Wang Gong once sat together with He Pushe. Gong was the prefect of Danyang at that time, and Dashi was the governor of Jingzhou. When the conversation was about to end, he urged everyone to drink a lot. Gong refused to drink, so Da forced him to drink. It became more and more painful, so they each tied their hands with their skirts. There were nearly a thousand people in Gong's mansion, and they were all called into the room. Although there were few left and right guards, they were also ordered to move forward, intending to kill each other. There was no plan for shooting, so they stood up and sat down in a row between two people, and then they were able to disperse. The ancients were ashamed of the so-called snobbish friendship.
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