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When Zigong asked about mourning, Confucius said, "Respect is the best, grief is the next, and thinness is the worst. The color of the face reflects the feelings; the sorrowful expression reflects the clothes." When asked about the mourning of brothers, Confucius said, "The mourning of brothers is recorded in the books and strategies. "A gentleman does not take away the mourning of others, nor should he take away his own mourning. Confucius said: "Shaolian and Dalian are good at mourning. They do not get tired for three days and do not stop for three months. They are sad for a long time and worried for three years. They are the sons of Dongyi. ”

Zeng Zi asked, "When a envoy dies in his residence, etiquette says: public residences are restored, but private residences are not restored. In all countries where envoys are granted residences by officials, public residences are already public residences, so why do you say that private residences are not restored?" Confucius said, "What a good question! The homes of ministers, officials, and scholars are called private residences; public residences and official residences are called public residences. The restoration of public residences is what it means." Zeng Zi asked, "The lower dead: Tu Zhou buried in the garden, and then went there by carriage, because the road was close. Now the tomb is far away, how should it be buried?" Confucius said, "I heard Lao Dan say: In the past, Shi Yi had a son who died, which was the lower dead. The tomb was far away, and Zhao Gong asked him, 'Why don't you bury him in the palace? ' Shi Yi said, 'How dare I? ’ Duke Zhao told Duke Zhou about this, and Duke Zhou said, ‘Is it not possible?’ Shi Yi did it. The use of coffins and coffins for the deceased was first introduced by Shi Yi.

The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.




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更新时间:2025-03-19

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