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A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
The people of Jin said that Wen Zi knew people. Wen Zi was so withdrawn that he seemed to be unable to wear clothes, and his words were so quiet that they seemed to be out of his mouth. He recommended more than 70 families of officials in charge of the treasury of Jin. He did not make friends with them when he was alive, and did not ask them to be his sons when he died. Shu Zhongpi learned from Zi Liu. When Shu Zhongpi died, his wife was from Lu. She wore mourning clothes and mourning clothes. Shu Zhongyan reported it to him and asked him to wear mourning clothes and mourning clothes, saying, "I also did this when I lost my aunt and sister in the past. I did not prohibit it." He withdrew and asked his wife to wear mourning clothes and mourning clothes.
Wang and Liu were together in the south of Hangzhou, and had a feast at Huanzi's home. Xie Zhenxi went to the Shangshu's tomb and returned, and cried again three days after the burial. Everyone wanted to take him back, so they first sent a letter, but he still did not agree, but he had already stopped the car. It’s important, so I’ll go back. Everyone met him outside the door, took his arm and went down, and was able to take off his cap and hat. Halfway through the feast, I realized I was still feeling tired.
Aigong said, "May I ask about Confucian conduct." Confucius replied, "I can't finish counting them all. If I count them all, I will stay. I can't finish them even if I change my servant."
When He Yan was seven years old, he was as bright and wise as a god, and Wei Wu loved him very much. Because Yan was in the palace, he wanted to adopt him as his son. Yan then drew a circle on the ground and placed himself in the middle of it. People asked why? He replied, "It is the He family's house." When Wei Wu knew about it, he sent him back.
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
Kang Sengyuan was in Yuzhang, several dozen miles away from the city, and built a monastery. There are mountains on the side and long rivers on the side, fragrant forests line the courtyards and clear streams rush around the halls. He studied and lectured at leisure, hoping to savor the essence of his works. Many people like Yu Gong went to see him. Watching him use breathing exercises, his temperament becomes better. In addition, he was content with his situation and felt happy, so his reputation grew. Later he couldn't bear it anymore and left.
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