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Therefore, the rite of audience is to clarify the righteousness between the monarch and the ministers. The rite of marriage is to make the princes respect each other. The rite of funeral and sacrifice is to clarify the grace of the ministers. The rite of drinking in the village is to clarify the order of the elders and the young. The rite of marriage is to clarify the difference between men and women. Rites are the source of restraint and chaos, just like the source of water in the village. Therefore, those who destroy the old temple because they think it is useless will surely be destroyed by water; those who destroy the old ritual because they think it is useless will surely be destroyed by water.
When Wang Xiaobo died, his head was hung on a big beam. Sima Taifu ordered his carriage to go out to the mark. When he saw the head of the enemy, he asked, "Why are you so anxious? Do you want to kill me?"
When a person dies, he should not be idle for three days, and he should not be relieved for three months. He should be sad for three years, and he should be worried for three years - this is the killing of grace. The sage uses killing to control moderation, and this is why mourning lasts for three years. The wise should not go beyond the limit, and the unworthy should not fail to reach the limit. This is the mean of mourning, and it is what the king always does. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is good; all kings should follow this ritual. Why is it good for him alone? It is said: Emperor Gaozong was Wu Ding; Wu Ding was a wise king of the Yin Dynasty. He succeeded the throne and was kind and good at mourning. At this time, the Yin Dynasty declined and revived, and rituals were abolished and revived, so he did it well. Because it was good, it was recorded in the book and praised, so he was called Emperor Gaozong. During the three-year mourning, the king did not speak. The Book of Documents says: "Emperor Gaozong was lenient and did not speak for three years." This is what it means. However, those who say "speaking without culture" refer to the ministers.
Yu, the staff shall not be brought into the room; bu, the staff shall not be raised in the hall. If you are the descendant of the monarch's mother, when the monarch's mother dies, you shall not wear the party clothes of the monarch's mother. The sash shall be reduced by one-fifth and the staff shall be as big as the sash. If a concubine is the eldest son of the monarch, she shall be treated the same as the daughter of the monarch. When the mourning is over, the heavier one is worn first; when the mourning is changed, the lighter one is changed. The temple gate is opened for no reason. All mourning is done in the next place. The inscription is written again, and the words are the same from the emperor to the scholar. Men are called by their names, and women write their surnames and their brothers and sisters. If the surname is unknown, they write their clan names.
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
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