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The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by respecting oneself?” Confucius replied, “When a gentleman speaks too much, the people will make excuses; when he acts too much, the people will make examples. If a gentleman does not speak too much and does not act too much, the people will respect him without being ordered. In this way, he can respect himself; if he can respect himself, he can complete his parents. ”The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by completing his parents?” Confucius replied, “A gentleman is a name for people. The people call him a son of a gentleman. This is to make their parents become gentlemen, and this is to complete their parents’ name!” Confucius then said, “In ancient times, the most important thing in governing was to love people. If you cannot love people, you cannot have your body; if you cannot have your body, you cannot be at peace with your land; if you cannot be at peace with your land, you cannot be happy with heaven; if you cannot be happy with heaven, you cannot complete your body.”

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Even after his parents die, if he wants to do good things and wants to bring good reputation to his parents, he will do it; if he wants to do bad things and wants to bring shame to his parents, he will not do it. When the uncle dies, the aunt will be old. The tomb-wife's sacrifices and guests must be asked to the aunt, and the intermediary woman must ask the tomb-wife. If the uncle and aunt use the tomb-wife, do not be lazy, be unfriendly and rude to the intermediary woman. If the uncle and aunt use the intermediary woman, do not dare to fight the tomb-wife, do not walk side by side, do not order her to do the same, and do not sit with her. All women should not leave unless they are ordered to go to the private room. If a woman has something to do, no matter how big or small, she must ask the uncle and aunt. The son's wife should not have private goods, private livestock, or private utensils. She should not borrow privately or give privately. If a woman gives food, clothing, cloth, pendants, or orchids to a man, he should accept them and offer them to his uncle and aunt. If the uncle and aunt accept them, they will be happy as if they had just received a gift. If they are given back, they should refuse and not be ordered. If they are given again, they should store them for future use. If a woman has a private brother who wants to give something, she must ask for the reason again and give it to him after he is given. Married sons and concubines only serve the eldest son and his wife. Even if they are rich, they dare not enter the eldest son's house with their wealth. Even if they have many carriages and servants, they should enter with a few. If the sons and younger brothers return utensils, clothing, furs, quilts, carriages and horses, they must offer the best ones before they dare to use the next best ones. If they are not offered, they dare not enter the eldest son's house with them, and dare not use their wealth to add to their father, brothers and clans. If they are rich, they should prepare two animals and offer the wisest one to the eldest son. The husband and wife should all be present and the clan should show respect. Only after the ceremony is over can they dare to offer sacrifices privately.

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