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When Xi Jiabin died, his attendants told Xi Gong that "his husband has passed away." Upon hearing this, Xi Gong was not sad, but said to his attendants, "We can tell you during the funeral." When Xi Gong went to the funeral, he was so sad that he almost died.
There are three reasons for not mourning a death: fear, disgust, and drowning.
When Wei Jie was a child, he asked Le Ling about his "dream", and Le Ling replied, "It's just thinking." Wei said, "If you dream about something that is not connected between your body and your spirit, how can it be imagination?" Le said, "It is cause. I have never dreamed of riding a car into a rat hole, or pounding vegetables with an iron pestle. This is because there is no imagination and no cause." Wei thought about the "cause" for several days but could not find one, and thus he fell ill. I was pleased to hear it, so I ordered my driver to analyze it. Wei is slightly worse. Le sighed and said, "This child must not have any serious illness in his chest!"
Zhongni was at a banquet, and Zi Zhang, Zi Gong, and Yan were there to accompany him. They talked about etiquette. The Master said: “Stop! I will tell you three about etiquette and let you go around with etiquette to cover everything.” Zi Gong crossed the mat and replied: “May I ask how it goes? ”The Master said, “Respect without following the rules of propriety is called wildness; respect without following the rules of propriety is called servility; courage without following the rules of propriety is called rebellion.” The Master said, “Serving others takes away kindness and benevolence.” The Master said, “Master, you are too much; and Shang is not as good as that. Zichan is like the mother of all people, who can feed them but cannot teach them.” Zigong crossed the table and replied, “May I ask what you will do to achieve this middle point?” The Master said, “Ritual! Rituals are used to set the middle point.”
Zhang Xuanzhi and Gu Fu were the grandchildren of Gu Hezhong. Both of them were smart and intelligent since they were young. He knew it, and often said that Gu Sheng was too close to Zhang, which made Zhang quite unhappy. At that time, Zhang was nine years old and Gu was seven years old. They went to the temple together. When they saw the Buddha's Nirvana statue, some of the disciples cried, while some did not. They asked their two grandsons about it. Xuan said, "Weep when you are loved by others, and don't cry when you are not loved by others." Fu said: "No, it is because I forgot my feelings that I did not cry, and I could not forget my feelings that I cried."
In mourning, one should not eat for three days; in mourning of the same age, one should not eat for two days; in mourning of the great merit, one should not eat for three days; in mourning of the minor merit, one should not eat for two days; in mourning of the scholar, one should not eat for one day. Therefore, in the funeral of parents, after the funeral, one should eat porridge, and in the morning, one should spill one rice, and no one should spill one rice; in mourning of the same age, one should eat simple food and drink water, and not eat vegetables and fruits; in mourning of the great merit, one should not eat soy sauce; in mourning of the minor merit, one should not drink sweet wine. This is the expression of grief in food and drink.
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