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The funeral of the deceased below the standard of mourning is not allowed: first go to the tomb, face west and cry out loud, remove the hemp cloth, face east, take the throne, cry and dance with the host, and then take the throne. If there is a guest, the host will bow to the guest and see him off; if there is a guest who arrives later, the host will bow to him as before. The attendant will tell them that the matter is over. Then he will wear a crown and go home, enter the door on the left, face north and cry out loud, remove the hemp cloth, then take the throne in the east, bow to the guest and dance. When the guest leaves, the host will bow to see him off. After crying again, the host will not bare the hemp cloth, then dance; after crying for the third time, the host will not bare the hemp cloth, then dance. After three days, the mourning period will be completed, and after crying for the fifth time, The lord of the house reported that the matter was completed.
When Chen Yuanfang lost his father, he cried and mourned until his body became emaciated. His mother felt sorry for him and secretly covered him with a brocade quilt. Guo Linzong came to express his condolences and saw him, and said to him, "You are a talented person in the country, and a role model for the whole country. How can you mourn with a brocade quilt covering you? Confucius said, 'To wear brocade and to eat rice, what good will it do you?' I will not accept it!" He threw away his clothes and left. From then on, no guests came for a hundred days.
Wang Dongting was the chief clerk of Huan Xuanwu. After he was loaned the position, he had a good reputation. The Duke really wanted him to become the leader of the prefecture. At first, he saw Xie Shiyi, but he looked calm. The guests sat down and laughed at each other. The Duke said, "No. Judging from his expression, he must be extraordinary. I will give it a try." Later, when the king was lying in ambush under the pavilion during the moonlit night, the Duke rode out from inside and attacked him. Those on both sides fell down, but the king did not move. His reputation and value thus greatly increased, and people all said that he was "a person who can assist the public."
Emperor Wen of Jin shared a carriage with the two Chens. He called for Zhong Hui to ride with him and then drove away. Compared to, it is already far away. When he arrived, the emperor mocked him and said, "You are so late when we meet. I see you are so far away." Hui replied, "I am a virtuous person, why should I stay with others?" The emperor asked Hui again, "What kind of person is Gao Yao?" He replied, "I am not as good as Yao and Shun, nor as good as Zhou and Confucius, but I am also a virtuous person of my time."
The Son of Heaven is equal to Heaven and Earth. Therefore, virtue matches heaven and earth, and benefits all things. It is as bright as the sun and the moon, illuminating the four seas without leaving out the small. In the court, the order of benevolence, holiness, propriety and righteousness is followed; in banquets, the music of Ya and Song is listened to; when walking, there is the sound of rings and pendants; when riding in a car, there is the sound of phoenixes and harmonious birds. There is propriety in residence, and there is moderation in advance and retreat. All officials are in their proper place, and all things are in their proper order. The Book of Songs says: "A virtuous man and a gentleman, his etiquette is not wrong. If his etiquette is not wrong, it will be the right way for the four countries." This is what it means. When the people are pleased with orders and decrees, it is called harmony; when the upper and lower are close to each other, it is called benevolence; when the people get what they want without asking for it, it is called trust; and when the harm of heaven and earth is removed, it is called righteousness. Righteousness and trustworthiness, harmony and benevolence are the tools of a hegemon. If there is the intention to govern the people but there is no tool, it will not work.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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