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When you are about to move away, don't make things too tight. When you are about to go to class, your voice must be loud. There are two shoes outside. If you hear the words, you can enter. If you don’t hear the words, you can’t enter. When entering a house, one must look down. When entering a house, lock the door firmly and do not look back; when the door is opened, open it; when the door is closed, close it; if someone comes in later, lock the door and do not let them in. Do not step on shoes, do not step on mats, and do not move towards corners by picking up clothes. Be cautious and keep your promises.
When Yin Hongqiao was appointed as the governor of Yuzhang County, before his departure, he left with about a hundred letters. When they reached the stones, they threw them all into the water, and said, "Those who sink will sink, and those who float will float. Yin Hongqiao cannot write a letter."
When Zhong Yu brothers were young, their father took a nap during the day, so they secretly drank medicinal wine together. His father woke up at the time and pretended to sleep to watch. Yu bowed before drinking, and drank together without bowing. Then he asked Yu why he bowed, Yu said: "Wine is the rite, I dare not not bow." He asked Hui why he did not bow, Hui said: "Stealing is not rite, so I do not bow."
To think about the constitution and seek the good is enough to be famous, but not enough to move the masses; to follow the virtuous and understand the distant is enough to move the masses, but not enough to transform the people. If a gentleman wants to transform the people and establish customs, he must learn!
Xu Wensi went to meet Gu and Xu, but Gu was already sleeping in the tent. When Xu arrived, they went straight to the corner of the bed and talked together. Afterwards, he called Gu to go with him. Gu ordered his attendants to take the new clothes on the pillow and change them into the ones he was wearing. Xu smiled and said, "Do you have the clothes you brought with you?"
The steward draws water, but does not twist it. He does not go up to the hall until the steps are up. He gives it to the driver. The driver takes a bath: four junior officials carry the quilt, and two drivers bathe. The water for bathing is a basin, the water for pouring is a ladle, the bathing is a gauze towel, and the stroking is a bathing robe, just like other days; the junior officials scratch the feet, and the remaining water is thrown into the pit. When the mother dies, the inner driver carries the quilt and bathes. The steward draws water and gives it to the driver. The driver bathes in the hall - the king bathes in liang, the senior official bathes in millet, and the scholar bathes in liang. The Dian people built a sieve under the west wall, the pottery people brought out the heavy cauldrons, the Guan people received the bath, and then cooked it. The Dian people took the firewood from the northwest of the temple and used it to cook. The Guan people gave the driver a bath, and then he bathed; he used a clay plate for bathing, and a towel for rubbing. As on other days, the small officials cut their hands and beards, wet and washed, and threw them on the ditch. The king set up a big plate to make ice, the senior officials set up a flat plate to make ice, and the scholars used clay plates without ice. They set up a bed and a pillow. One bed was covered, one bed was covered, and another bed was moved to the hall. There were pillows and mats for the king, senior officials, and scholars.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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