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Therefore, a gentleman should be cautious and not lose his face in front of others. The king should be polite, and the ministers should be inferior to him. The ministers should be polite, and the scholars should be inferior to him. Etiquette should not be given to common people, and punishment should not be given to ministers. Punishers should not be at the king's side.
When holding the emperor's utensils, one should put on the balance, the king should balance, the great officials should rein it, and the scholars should carry it.
Xie Wan was in front of his brother and wanted to get up to ask for the toilet. At that time, Ruan Sikuang was sitting there and said, "I am new to the family, so I am so respectful and rude."
In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
Liu Yin said to Xie Renzu, "Since I had four friends, my disciples have become closer." He said to Xu Xuandu, "Since I have my reasons, no bad words will reach my ears." Both of them accepted it without resentment.
During the funeral of Duke Dao, Ji Zhaozi asked Meng Jingzi, "What should the monarch eat?" Jingzi said, "Eating porridge is the most common etiquette in the world. The fact that we three ministers cannot live in the public office has been heard by everyone in the four directions. If I try hard to be poor, then I can do it. Wouldn't it make people suspect that I live in poor conditions without emotion? I will eat."
When Xie Gong's fellow disciples gathered together, he asked Mao which line of poetry was the best? E Cheng said, "When I went there in the past, the willows were swaying; when I come back now, it is raining and snowing." The Duke said, "The destiny is determined by careful planning, and the distant plans are announced in due course." He said that this sentence has the profound meaning of an elegant person.
Zeng Zi fell ill in bed. Music director Zichun sat under the bed, Zeng Yuan and Zeng Shen sat at his feet, and a boy sat in the corner holding a candle. The boy said, "It's bright and clear, is it the coffin of the senior official?" Zichun said, "Stop!" Zengzi heard it and said in a daze, "Huh!" He said, "It's bright and clear, is it the coffin of the senior official?" Zengzi said, "Yes, it was given by Jisun, I can't change it. Yuan, get up and change the coffin." Zeng Yuan said, "Master's illness has worsened, it can't be changed. Fortunately, it's still here in the morning, please change it respectfully." Zengzi said, "Your love for me is not as good as his. A gentleman loves people with virtue, while a mean person loves people with tolerance. What do I want? I can die properly, that's all." He lifted him up and changed it. He turned the mat and died before he could settle down.
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