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After Su Zigao's incident was settled, Lords Wang and Yu wanted to appoint Kong Tingwei as the governor of Danyang. After the chaos, the people were in poverty. Kong said with a sigh, "When Emperor Suzong was dying, you all personally ascended the imperial bed and were recognized by him, and followed his will. I am a distant and lowly person, and I am not among those who were there to take charge of the affairs of the state. When times were tough, you put me first. Now I am just rotten meat on the table, waiting to be chopped up by anyone!" Then he left, and the other gentlemen also stopped.

It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.

Liu Yin said: "People say Jiang has farmhouses, but Jiang actually has his own farmhouses."

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When a horse died on the road, he buried it with a curtain.

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When Mr. Lin saw the Changshan of Dongyang, he said, "How smooth and straight it is!"

The princess said she was beautiful and kind.

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Confucius said: Those who make Mingqi know the way of funeral, and they prepare things but cannot use them. Alas! The dead are used with the utensils of the living. Isn't it dangerous to use them as sacrifices? Mingqi means to show the gods. Painting carts with straw spirits has existed since ancient times, and it is the way of Mingqi. Confucius said that those who make straw spirits are good, and those who make figurines are unkind - isn't it dangerous to use people!

Love in Paris

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The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"

Extraordinary Entertainment

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Zeng Zi asked: "The girl is on the road when the groom's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The girl changes her clothes to a deep cloth and a white cloth to go to the funeral. If the girl is on the road and her parents die, she should return. "If the man-to-be comes to marry the daughter, but the daughter has not yet arrived, and there is a mourning ceremony of Qisui Dagong, what should be done?" Confucius said: "If the man does not come, he should change his clothes to the outer place; if the woman comes, she should change her clothes to the inner place; then she should take the throne and cry." Zengzi asked: "After the mourning is over, will the wedding ceremony be repeated?" Confucius said: "Sacrifice is not offered after the time is up, it is a ritual; why go back to the beginning?" Confucius said: "The family of marrying a daughter does not extinguish the candles for three nights, thinking of the separation. The family of marrying a daughter does not play music for three days, thinking of the successor. After three months, the temple is visited, which is called the coming daughter. Choose a day to offer sacrifices to the gods, which is the meaning of completing the daughter." Zengzi asked: "If the daughter dies before the temple is visited, what should be done?" Confucius said: "Do not move to the ancestors, do not bury her with the emperor's aunt, the man-to-be does not stick, do not give her money, and do not bury her in order, and return her to the party of the daughter's family to show that she is not a complete daughter." Zengzi asked: "Marry a daughter, on an auspicious day, and she dies, what should be done? "Confucius said, "A son-in-law mourns in the age of mourning, and removes the mourning after the burial. The same is true for a husband's death." Zengzi asked, "There are two orphans in a funeral, and two masters in a temple. Is this a ritual?" Confucius said, "There is no two suns in the sky, no two kings on earth, and there is no two superiors in the sacrifices to the suburbs. I don't know if it is a ritual. In the past, Duke Huan of Qi hurriedly raised his army and pretended to be a master. When he returned, he hid in the ancestral temple. The temple has two masters, which started with Duke Huan. The two orphans in a funeral, it was in the past when Duke Ling of Wei went to Lu and encountered the funeral of Ji Huanzi. The King of Wei asked for condolences, but Duke Ai declined and was not allowed to do so. The Duke was the master and the guest condoled. Kangzi stood on the right side of the door, facing north; the Duke bowed and yielded, ascended from the east steps, and faced west; the guest ascended from the west steps to condole. The Duke bowed, stood up, and cried; Kangzi bowed and bowed his head in his seat, and the officials did not argue. The two orphans today are the fault of Ji Kangzi. ”

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Sikou Manshuang

Zhuge Jin's younger brother Liang and his cousin Dan were both famous and each served in a different country. At that time, people believed that "Shu got its dragon, Wu got its tiger, and Wei got its dog." Dan was as famous as Xiahou Xuan in Wei; Jin was in Wu, and the Wu court admired his magnanimity.

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