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Chengren had a brother who died but did not wear mourning clothes. When he heard that Zigao would be the chief minister of Chengren, he wore mourning clothes. Chengren said, "Silkworms weave and crabs have ribs, fan weaves and cicadas have ribbons. When his brother died, Zigao wore mourning clothes."
When Confucius passed by the side of Mount Tai, a woman was crying at a grave. Confucius stood up and listened to her. He asked Zilu to ask her, "Your crying seems to be deeply worried." She said, "Yes, my uncle died of a tiger in the past, my husband also died there, and now my son has died there too." The Master asked, "Why don't you leave?" She said, "No harsh government." The Master said, "My boy, you know it. Harsh government is more fierce than a tiger."
When Pan Yangzhong saw Wang Dun as a child, he said to him, "Your bee eyes have been revealed, but your jackal cry has not yet been heard. You will surely be able to eat people, and you will also be eaten by people.
Zilu asked about strength, and the Master said: "Is it the strength of the South? Is it the strength of the North? Is it the strength of suppression? To teach with kindness and gentleness, and not to retaliate against the unrighteous, is the strength of the South, and the gentleman lives in it. Wearing armor and not being tired of dying, is the strength of the North, and the strong live in it. Therefore, the gentleman is harmonious but not swayed, how strong and correct! To stand in the middle but not lean, how strong and correct! If the country has the way, do not change and block it, how strong and correct! If the country has no way, do not change until death, how strong and correct! "
Confucian scholars dress moderately, move cautiously, show slowness when they are big and false when they are small, show authority when they are big and shame when they are small, and they are difficult to advance and easy to retreat, and they are like incompetent. Their appearance is like this.
When Sun Qiyou and Qizhuang were young, they visited Duke Yu. The Duke asked, "What is Qiyou's name?" He replied, "Qiyou." The Duke said, "What Qi do you want?" He replied, "Qi Xuyou." "What is Qizhuang's name?" He replied, "Qi Zhuang." The Duke asked, "What Qi do you want?" He replied, "Qi Zhuangzhou." The Duke said, "Why do you admire Zhuangzhou instead of Confucius?" He replied, "Sages are knowledgeable, so they are hard to admire." Duke Yu was very pleased with the child's answer.
Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
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