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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
During the funeral of Confucius, two or three disciples all wore mourning clothes and went out. They wore mourning clothes when they were in a group, but not when they went out.
Honglu Qing Kong Qun loved drinking. Prime Minister Wang said, "Why do you ask about drinking? Haven't you seen wine shops cover their wine jars with cloth, which have been rotten for years?" Qun said, "If it weren't for that, I wouldn't have seen rotten meat, which would have made it last longer." Qun once wrote to his relatives and friends, "This year I got 700 hu of sorghum from my fields, but I didn't have time to make glutinous rice."
Huan Xuanwu was not very understanding in talking to Emperor Jianwen. After deposing Haixi, he should explain himself, so he wrote several hundred words in advance to explain his intention to depose and establish the throne. When he saw Jianwen, he burst into tears for dozens of lines. Xuanwu was so ashamed that he could not say a word.
Zhi Daolin first came from the east and lived in Dong'an Temple. Wang Changshi had a meticulous plan and had written a brilliant essay. When he talked with Zhi about it, he could not quite get along with him. Wang Xuzhi wrote several hundred words, claiming that they were full of famous theories and extraordinary writings. Zhi said slowly, "I have not seen you for many years, and you have made no progress in your righteousness." Wang was ashamed and left.
The emperor offers sacrifices to heaven and earth, to the four directions, to mountains and rivers, and to the five sacrifices every year. The princes offer sacrifices to the four directions, to mountains and rivers, and to the five sacrifices every year. The officials offer sacrifices to the five sacrifices every year. The scholars offer sacrifices to their ancestors.
Fu Gu is good at talking about empty victories, while Xun Can鈥檚 conversation is profound and far-reaching. Whenever they talked together, there were arguments and they could not understand each other. Pei Jizhou explained the meaning of the two families, understood the thoughts of both sides, and always made both sides feel satisfied and happy.
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