自拍屁眼

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《自拍屁眼》

Do not pull the coming, do not report the past, do not blaspheme the gods, do not follow the wrong, do not predict the unknown. Scholars rely on virtue and enjoy art; workers rely on law and enjoy persuasion. Do not criticize clothes and tools, do not be pedantic of words. The beauty of words is solemn and majestic; the beauty of the court is full of people; the beauty of sacrifice is orderly and majestic; the beauty of carriages and horses is not timid; the beauty of phoenixes is solemn and peaceful. Ask the king's sons, the elder one says: "He can follow the affairs of the state"; the younger one says: "He can control" or "He can't control". When asked about the age of a senior official's son, if he is older, he will say, "He can follow the music of the musicians"; if he is younger, he will say, "He can be correct in the music of the musicians" but he cannot be correct in the music of the musicians". When asked about the age of a scholar's son, if he is older, he will say, "He can plough the fields"; if he is younger, he will say, "He can carry firewood" but he cannot carry firewood. He cannot walk when holding a jade or tortoise shell, nor when he is in the hall or on the city wall. He cannot walk in a military carriage; the intermediary cannot bow.

Huan Xuan once climbed up to the southern tower of Jiangling City and said, "I want to write a eulogy for Wang Xiaobo now." He chanted and whistled for a long time, and then began to write. I took a moment to sit and write this eulogy.

When the dukes sent people to the dukes, the messengers called themselves "guaijunzhilao". The emperor is solemn, the princes are majestic, the great officials are numerous, the scholars are staggering, and the common people are humble.

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最新章节：道雷，原罪（2025-03-18）

更新时间：2025-03-18

Monkey King

Hu Xinyou

Shi Chong made bean porridge for his guests, and it was ready in a snap. In constant winter, you can get leeks, duckweed and amaranth. Moreover, the ox was not as big and strong as Wang Kai's ox, but he went out with Kai and set out very late, trying to get into Luo City. He followed the ox for dozens of steps and was as fast as a bird. Kai's ox could not catch up with him at all. These three things always make me feel regretful. He then secretly bribed the governor and the charioteer under Chong's tent and asked them the reason. The governor said, "Beans are difficult to cook, so just grind them into powder in advance. When guests come, make white porridge for them. Chives and duckweed are made by mashing leek roots and mixing them with wheat seedlings." He then asked the driver how the ox was moving. The driver said, "The ox is not slow at all. It's just that the driver cannot control it in time. If you let the shaft lean to the side in a hurry, the ox will move forward." Kai followed his advice and competed for the lead. When Shi Chong heard about it later, he killed all the informants.

Alien Adventures

Song Huo

From Hengshan to Nanhe, it is close for a thousand li; from Nanhe to Jiang, it is close for a thousand li. From Jiang to Hengshan, it is a thousand li away; from Donghe to Donghai, it is a thousand li away. From Donghe to Xihe, it is close for a thousand li; from Xihe to Liusha, it is a thousand li away. The west is not full of the Quicksand, the south is not full of the Hengshan Mountains, the east is not close to the East Sea, and the north is not full of the Hengshan Mountains. Within the four seas, the long and short are supplemented, and the square of 3,000 li is 80 trillion and 1 trillion mu of land. The square of 100 li is 9 billion mu of land: mountains, forests, rivers, canals, cities, palaces, roads and lanes, one third minus one, the remaining 6 billion mu.

The tough ghost hunting career

Hui Danyan

Aigong said, "May I ask about Confucian conduct." Confucius replied, "I can't finish counting them all. If I count them all, I will stay. I can't finish them even if I change my servant."

Great Wealth

Liang Qiujing

Yang Gong returned to Luo, and Guo Yi was made the magistrate of Yewang. When Yang reached the border, he sent people to retrieve him. Guo then went there by himself. After seeing him, he sighed and said, "Why should Uncle Yang reduce Guo Taiye!" He went to Yang Xu again and brought back a small amount of money. He sighed again and said, "Uncle Yang is far away from people!" After Yang left, Guo saw him off for a whole day, traveling hundreds of miles in one go, and then he resigned from his post and left the country. He sighed again and said, "Why should Uncle Yang be inferior to Yan Zi?"

Cang Shen Tu

Qi Yongtian

The military governor asked Yin Hao, "How do you compare to Pei Yimin?" After a long pause, Yin Hao replied, "So I should win."

The Poison Queen Returns Home with a Tyrant

Dongguo Yonglong

Confucians are knowledgeable but not exhausted, and they practice diligently but not tired; they live in seclusion but not licentious, and they are connected with their superiors but not in trouble; they value harmony in etiquette, the beauty of loyalty and trustworthiness, and the law of leisure. They promote the virtuous and tolerate the masses, and criticize the square and unite the tiles. Their generosity is like this.

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