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When Liu Yin went to meet Wang Changshi Xu Qingyan, Gou Zi was thirteen years old at that time, leaning against the bed and listening. After he left, he asked his father, "How is Liu Yin's speech compared to mine?" The chief secretary said, "His elegant voice and graceful words are not as good as mine; but he always defeats the enemy, and he is worse than me."
When Xi Jiabin died, his attendants told Xi Gong that "his husband has passed away." Upon hearing this, Xi Gong was not sad, but said to his attendants, "We can tell you during the funeral." When Xi Gong went to the funeral, he was so sad that he almost died.
After General Wang died, Wang Ying wanted to join the worldly Confucian scholars, who were in charge of Jiangzhou. Wang Han wanted to surrender to Wang Shu, who was in charge of Jingzhou. Han said to Ying, "What is the relationship between the general and Jiangzhou? And you want to return there?" Ying said, "That's why I should go. When the people of Jiangzhou were strong, they were able to resist the opposition, which is not what ordinary people do. But when they see the decline and danger, they will surely be moved. How can Wen, the governor of Jingzhou, act according to your will?" Han refused, and they all surrendered to Shu. Shu Guosan and his son were drowned in the river. When Bin heard that he should come, he secretly prepared a boat to wait for him. But in fact he could not come, and he was deeply angry.
Xu Yun was executed by King Jing of Jin, and his disciple went in to tell his wife. The woman was working on the loom, her expression unchanged, and she said, "I knew it early!" The servants wanted to hide the child, but the woman said, "Don't get involved in the child's affairs." Later, the child was moved to a tomb, and King Jing sent Zhong Hui to look after him. If the child had talent like his father, he would be taken in. The child asked his mother for advice. The mother said: "Although you are good, you don't have much talent. Just speak from your heart and you will have nothing to worry about. You don't have to be too sad. Just stop when you can. You can also ask less about court affairs." The children followed her advice. He then reported the case and was finally released.
Fan Qi and Yan wrote a guest letter: "Zi Jing raises his body without any mercy, and his skin has no residual moisture." Yan replied: "There is no residual moisture in lifting the body, how can the body be not real?"
Wang Hun’s second wife was a daughter of Yan from Langya. At that time, Wang was the governor of Xuzhou. After exchanging greetings, Wang was about to return the greeting, but the onlookers all said, "The king is a marquis and a governor of the state, and the new bride is a citizen of the state. I am afraid there is no way for us to return the greeting." So the king stopped. Wu Zi was afraid that his father did not respond to his greeting and the ceremony was not completed, so he was afraid that they were not husband and wife; he did not bow for him and said that he was Yan's concubine. The Yan family was ashamed of it. Because of his noble family background, I dared not leave.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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