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The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
Youzi asked Zengzi: "Have you asked about funerals, Master?" He said: "I have heard that funerals want to get poor quickly, and death wants to decay quickly." Youzi said: "This is not what a gentleman says." Zengzi said: "Shen heard it from the Master." Youzi said again: "This is not what a gentleman says." Zengzi said: "Shen and Ziyou heard it." Youzi said: "Yes, then the Master said it for a reason." Zengzi told Ziyou this. Ziyou said, "How wonderful! Youzi's words are similar to yours. Once upon a time, when the Master was living in Song, he saw Sima Huan making a stone coffin for himself, which took three years to complete. The Master said, 'If it is so, then it is better to decay quickly than to die.' The desire to decay quickly was what Sima Huan said. When Nangong Jingshu returned, he would bring treasures with him to the court. The Master said, 'If it is so, then it is better to become poor quickly than to be buried.' The desire to become poor quickly was what Jingshu said." Zengzi told him what Ziyou said. When Youzi was talking to Youzi, Youzi said, "Yes, I have always said that this is not what the Master said." Zengzi said, "How do you know this?" Youzi said, "The Master made a four-inch coffin and a five-inch outer coffin in Zhongdu, so he knew that he did not want to decay quickly. In the past, when the Master lost the position of Sikou of Lu and was about to go to Jing, he first asked Zixia and then Ran You, so he knew that he did not want to become poor quickly."
Emperor Xiaowu held a meeting in the West Hall, and Fu Tao sat down in advance. When he got off the car, he called his son and said to him, "In a gathering of hundreds of people, before sitting down, he asked, 'Where is Fu Tao? Is he here?' This is why it is not easy to answer. How is it to be a father like this?"
The reason why the ancient kings ruled the world is five: valuing virtue, valuing nobility, valuing the elderly, respecting the elders, and loving the young. These five are the reason why the ancient kings ruled the world. Valuing virtue, why? Because it is close to the Tao. Valuing nobility is because it is close to the monarch. Valuing the elderly is because it is close to relatives. Respecting the elders is because it is close to brothers. Loving the young is because it is close to children. Therefore, the most filial is close to the king, and the most brotherly is close to the hegemon. The most filial is close to the king, even if it is the emperor, there must be a father; the most brotherly is close to the hegemon, even if it is a prince, there must be a brother. The teachings of the ancient kings are followed and not changed, so they can lead the world and the country. Confucius said: "To establish love from one's relatives is to teach people to be harmonious. To establish education from one's elders is to teach people to be obedient. Teach people to be kind and harmonious, and people will value being close to one's relatives; teach people to respect elders, and people will value being obedient. Filial piety to parents, obedience to orders, and this is practiced throughout the world."
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