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The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
When Liu Lingyan first entered Luoyang, he saw many famous scholars and sighed, "Wang Yifu is too wise, I respect Le Yanfu, but I don't understand Zhang Maoxian, Zhou Hongwu is good at using his shortcomings, and Du Fangshu is clumsy at using his length."
When the father is in mourning, the sons in the palace cannot participate in the music. When the mother is in mourning, If the sound is heard, do not play music. If the wife is in mourning, do not play music beside her. When a great achievement is about to come, set aside the zither and the harp. When a small achievement comes, do not stop the music.
Confucians have the same aspirations and the same principles. They are happy to be together and never get tired of each other. They do not believe rumors when they have not seen each other for a long time. They act according to their principles and establish righteousness. They advance when they are together and retreat when they are different. This is their friendship.
Xie Cheqi asked Xie Gong: "If a person is really aloof, why is he so important?" He replied: "It is because he does not see it! Seeing Zi Jing still makes people unable to stop."
The king does not take away the jade without a reason; the ministers do not hang the zither without a reason, and the scholars do not play the zither without a reason. If the scholars have made offerings to the king, the king will ask him the next day, "Where did you take it?" He will bow twice and then answer.
When Xie Wan went on the northern expedition, he often whistled and sang to show off his superiority, and never tried to comfort his soldiers. Xie Gong loved Wan very much, but he knew that he would definitely fail, so he went with him. Congrong said to Wan: "You are the marshal, you should invite the generals to banquets more often to win their hearts." Wan followed his advice. He summoned all the generals, but none of them said anything. He just pointed at the four people sitting around him and said, "You are all strong soldiers." The generals were very angry. In order to express his gratitude and trust, Mr. Xie personally visited everyone from the captain of the army to the commander-in-chief and expressed his sincere gratitude. When everything went wrong, the army wanted to get rid of him. He then said, "I should become a hermit." So fortunately he was spared.
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