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Confucius said: "The Way is not far from people. If people practice the Way and distance themselves from others, they cannot be considered the Way. The Book of Songs says: 'Cut the wood, chop the wood, its principle is not far away.' Holding a stick to chop wood, looking at it from a distance, it still seems far away. Therefore, a gentleman governs people by their own way, and stops when he changes. Loyalty and forgiveness are not far from the Way. If you do not want to do it yourself, do not do it to others. There are four ways of a gentleman, and I have not been able to do any of them. What I ask of my son is to serve my father, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my minister is to serve my king, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my younger brother is to serve my elder brother, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my friends is to give them first, but I have not been able to do it. The actions of a mediocre person are cautious; if there is something that is lacking, he dare not not try hard, and if there is something that is more than enough, he dare not use it all; if he speaks, he will act accordingly, and if he acts, he will act accordingly. Why does a gentleman not have to be frank!"
Wang Dun’s brother Han was Guanglu Xun. After Dun rebelled, he stationed himself in Nanzhou, and Han resigned and fled to Gusu. Prime Minister Wang went to the palace to express his gratitude. The Minister of the Interior, the Prime Minister, and the officials of Yangzhou questioned him, but he was so confused that he didn't know what to say. Gu Sikong was then the deputy governor of Yangzhou. Yuan Han said, "Wang Guanglu has gone far away to avoid rumors, and you are lying in the dust on the road. The people below are worried. I wonder how you are doing?"
Someone asked the military governor, "How good is Yin Hao in his talks?" He replied, "I can't beat others, but I can at least win the hearts of the people."
The first ten years of a person's life are spent as a child, learning. At twenty, one is weak and then crowned. At thirty, a man is considered strong and has a wife. At forty one is strong and can serve in an official capacity. At fifty, he is called Ai, and he serves as an official. Sixty is called Ji, which means to give instructions. Seventy is considered old, and time for passing on. Eighty or ninety years old is called mao, and seven years old is called dao. Even if the people of dao and mao are guilty, they shall not be punished. A hundred years is called Yi.
Ritual is to the right state: it is like a scale to weight, a ruler to straightness, and a compass to squareness. Therefore, if the scale is honestly hung, it cannot be deceived by the weight; if the ruler is honestly laid out, it cannot be deceived by the crookedness; if the rules are honestly set up, it cannot be deceived by the squareness and roundness; a gentleman examines the rites and cannot be accused of treachery. Therefore, those who respect the rites and follow the rites are called the gentlemen with the rules; those who do not respect the rites and do not follow the rites are called the people without the rules. It is the way of respect and yielding. Therefore, when serving the ancestral temple, one is respectful; when entering the court, the noble and the humble have their positions; when living at home, the father and son are close and the brothers are harmonious; when living in the village, the elders and the young are in order. Confucius said: "To settle the state and govern the people, nothing is better than rites." This is what he meant.
As a son, you must tell your parents when you go out and see them when you come back. Where you go must be regular and what you learn must be disciplined. Never say old. If one is twice as old as his father, he should be served by his father; if one is ten years older than his elder brother, he should be served by his elder brother; if one is five years older than his elder brother, he should be served by his shoulder. When five people live in a group, the elder one must sit at a separate seat.
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