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When Zilu's sister died, he could have removed his hairpin, but he didn't. Confucius asked, "Why didn't you remove it?" Zilu said, "I have few brothers and sisters, but I can't bear it." Confucius said, "The previous kings established the rituals, and people on the road can't bear it." Zilu heard about it and removed it.
When Yu Zisong finished writing a fu, his follower Wenkang saw it and asked, "If there is intention, then it is not the end of fu; if there is no intention, then what is there to write about?" He replied, "It is somewhere between intention and no intention."
A senior official starts to work at the age of seventy. If he is not thanked, he must be given a stick and forced to do the work with women. Go to all directions, riding in a safe carriage. If one calls himself "old man", he will use his name when he is in his own country; if one is asked about something in another country, he will be sure to tell them the customs.
After Confucius was buried in Fang, he said: "I have heard that in ancient times, there were tombs but no graves; now there are mounds, and people from all directions can be recognized." So he sealed it and made it four feet high.
Zhong Yu was a Huangmen Lang. He was alert and was at the banquet with King Jing. At that time, Xuanbo, the son of Chen Qun, and Yuanxia, the son of Wu Zhou, were sitting together and they laughed at Yu. King Jing asked, "What kind of person is Gao Yao?" He replied, "He is a virtuous man in ancient times." Turning back to Xuanbo and Yuanxia, he said, "A gentleman is inclusive but not partial, and he is a group but not a party."
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
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