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The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Sun Changle's brothers went to Xie Gong's accommodation, and their words were mixed.
Confucian scholars live in a difficult place, sit up and stand respectfully, speak first and be honest, and act uprightly. They do not compete for the benefits of danger and ease on the road, and do not compete for the harmony of yin and yang in winter and summer. They love death and wait for it, and nourish their bodies and do things. They are like this in their preparation.
When Shi Daizhong died, he had no son, but six concubines. He asked for the successor. He said: "Bathing and wearing jade are omens." All five of them bathed and wore jade; Shi Qizi asked: "Who bathes and wears jade when mourning a parent?" No bathing or jade. Shi Qizi said.
The people of Wei believed that turtles were knowledgeable. Chen Ziche died in Wei. His wife and her family's senior officials planned to bury him alive with her. After the plan was finalized, Chen Zikang arrived and told her, "My master is ill and there is no one to take care of him. Please bury him alive with me." Zikang said, "Burying him alive with me is not a courtesy. Even if I do, who should take care of him like my wife and the prime minister? If I have to, I will do it. If I have to, I will let my two sons do it." So he did not do it.
In the teaching of the university, there must be regular work during the teaching, and there must be study after resting. If you don't learn to play the string, you can't play the string properly; if you don't learn to read the Book of Songs, you can't play the Book of Songs properly; if you don't learn to wear various clothes, you can't play the rites properly; if you don't learn to play the art, you can't enjoy learning. Therefore, the gentleman hides, cultivates, rests, and wanders in learning. Therefore, he is at ease with his learning and loves his teacher, enjoys his friends and believes in his way. Therefore, even if he leaves his teacher, he will not turn back. The Book of Changes says: "Respect your grandchildren and be diligent in time, and then your cultivation will come." Is this what it means!
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