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Huan Xuanwu was not very understanding in talking to Emperor Jianwen. After deposing Haixi, he should explain himself, so he wrote several hundred words in advance to explain his intention to depose and establish the throne. When he saw Jianwen, he burst into tears for dozens of lines. Xuanwu was so ashamed that he could not say a word.
When the dukes met the emperor, they called themselves "minister so-and-so" and "hou so-and-so". When they talked with the people, they called themselves "guaren"; when they were in mourning clothes, they called themselves "shizigu". When they attended sacrifices, they called themselves "filial son so-and-so and hou so-and-so" in the inner court, and "great-grandson so-and-so and hou so-and-so" in the outer court. When they died, they called themselves "hong", and when they came back, they called themselves "so-and-so fu fu yi". When they met the emperor after the burial, it was called "lei jian". When they talked about posthumous titles, it was called "lei".
Jia Chong's wife, Li, wrote a set of instructions for girls, which were circulated in the world. The daughter of Li, the wife of King Xian of Qi, and the daughter of Guo, the empress of Emperor Hui. After Chong died, Li and Guo's daughters each wanted to be buried together with their mother, but they could not decide for years. After Empress Jia was deposed, Lady Li was enshrined in the royal family and the burial was decided.
King Wen of Jin praised Ruan Sizong as extremely cautious. Whenever he spoke to him, his words were profound and far-reaching, and he never praised or criticized anyone.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When Wang Yi Shao was in Kuaiji, when he first arrived, Zhi Daoling was there. Sun Xinggong said to Wang, "Zhi Daolin is an innovative and unique person with a broad mind. Do you want to meet him?" Wang had his own unique spirit and looked down on Zhi Daolin. Later, Sun and Zhi were carried together to Wang Xu, the king's capital, and they did not interact with each other. After a moment they retreated, and just as the king was about to set out, his carriage was already at the door. Zhi said to the king, "You can't leave yet. I want to talk to you a little." Then he talked about Zhuangzi's "Xiaoyaoyou". Zhi wrote thousands of words, with novel talent and brilliant words. The king then opened his collar and undressed, unable to stop lingering.
Invite the guest, "Throw it in order. If the two throws are not released, the winner will drink. After the cup is served, please set up a horse for the winner. One horse follows two horses. After three horses are set up, please celebrate with more horses." The host asked the host to do the same.
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