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A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
Huan Cheqi is not good at picking up new clothes. After bathing, the woman gave him new clothes. The cavalry was furious and urged them to take him away. The woman brought it back and said, "The clothes are not new, so how can they be old?" Duke Huan laughed and chopped it off.
Wang Gong was with his father in Kuaiji, and Wang Dazi also came to pay homage to his father's tomb. Gong went to the tomb to see them for a while. The two men were on good terms with each other, so he returned after more than ten days. The father asked Gong, "Why did you take so many days?" He replied, "I was talking to A Da, and he was so busy that he couldn't go home." The father then said to him, "I'm afraid A Da is not your friend." In the end, they became friends, and it turned out to be just as he said.
Mr. Tao was strict in character and diligent in his work. When he was in charge of Jingzhou, he ordered the ship officers to record all the sawdust, regardless of the amount, but no one understood the meaning of this. Later, when we were having a meeting, the snow had just begun to clear up, and the ground was still wet after clearing the snow before the hearing, so we covered it with sawdust, and it was not a problem. The officials were ordered to use thick bamboos and pile them up like a mountain. Later, Huan Xuanwu attacked Shu and loaded the ships with goods, all of which were used to make nails. It is also said that once a bamboo pole was fired, an official took it up with the roots, and it was still enough, so he lifted it over two steps to use it.
Shan Jilun was the governor of Jingzhou, and he often went out for fun. People composed a song about it, saying: "Shan Gong was drunk once, and went straight to Gaoyang Pond. He returned home without a care in the world, and knew nothing about tea. He could ride a fine horse, and chopsticks upside down on the fence. He raised his hand and asked Ge Qiang, how he compared to the boy from Bingzhou?" Gaoyang Pond is in Xiangyang. Qiang was his favorite general, and was from Bingzhou.
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