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During Bo Gao's funeral, the envoys of the Kong family had not arrived yet, and Ran Zi took the silk bundle and rode a horse to lead them. Confucius said: "Strange! It makes me disloyal to Bo Gao."

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The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.

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Youzi and Ziyou stood and saw a young man admiring her. Youzi said to Ziyou, "I don't know why people dance in mourning. I have wanted to leave for a long time. Is it true that the emotion is here?" Ziyou said, "In etiquette, there are those who have subtle emotions, those who have things for a reason, and those who have direct emotions and act directly. This is the way of the barbarians. Etiquette is not like this. When people are happy, they are happy, and when they are happy, they sing. When they sing, they are hesitant. When they are hesitant, they dance. When they dance, they are upset. When they are upset, they are sad. When they are sad, they sigh. When they sigh, they are shy. When they are shy, they dance. , this is called etiquette. When a person dies, this is to hate it, and if you are incompetent, this is to betray it. Therefore, the quilt is made and the bamboo leaves are set, so that people will not hate it. When a person dies, dried meat and salted meat are offered as sacrifices; before the funeral, the person is sent to carry the body; after the funeral, the body is eaten, and no one has ever seen a feast. Since the ancient times, there has never been a place to keep it, so that people will not betray it. Therefore, what you criticize about etiquette is not a criticism of etiquette. "

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Confucius said, "If you are respectful, you can use the sacrificial vessels. Therefore, a gentleman does not abandon etiquette for cheapness, nor does he abandon etiquette for beauty." Therefore, the etiquette of eating is: if the host personally presents the food, the guest will offer the food; if the host does not personally present the food, the guest will not offer the food. Therefore, if a gentleman is not polite, he will not eat even if the food is beautiful. The Book of Changes says, "The eastern neighbor slaughters a cow, but it is not as good as the western neighbor's sacrifice, which actually benefits him." The Book of Songs says, "After being drunk with wine, after being full with virtue." This shows the people, the people still compete for profit and forget righteousness. Confucius said, "Seven days of abstention, three days of preparation, carry one person to make a corpse, and those who pass by will run away, to teach respect." Li wine is in the room, Di wine is in the hall, and Cheng wine is below, to show the people not to be licentious. The corpse drinks three times, and the guests drink once, to show the people that there is a hierarchy. Because of the wine and meat, the clans gather together to teach the people to be harmonious. Therefore, the upper hall observes the room, and the lower hall observes the upper. The Book of Songs says: "The etiquette is complete, and the laughter is complete."

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In the case of parents' funeral, after the funeral, people cry, and the pillars, lintels and screens are cut, and do not wear sackcloth or bees; after a period of time, a small funeral is held, people live in a whitened room, and sleep on mats; after another period of time, a big funeral is held, people live and sleep again; in the middle of the month, people mourn, and use a bed.

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