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When parents are ill, those who wear hats do not comb their hair, walk do not gallop, talk do not lazily, do not play the zither and the qin, eat meat without changing its taste, drink wine without changing its appearance, laugh do not laugh too loudly, and be angry without swearing. The disease stops and returns to normal.
Zhongni said: "The gentleman is moderate, the villain is the opposite of the moderate. The gentleman's moderation is the gentleman who is moderate at times; the villain's moderation is the villain who is unscrupulous."
When Wang Xun was ill, he asked Wang Wugang, "Who do people compare my army to?" Wugang replied, "People compare me to Wang Beizhonglang." Dongting turned around and lay facing the wall, sighing, "People cannot live forever!"
A filial son will not obey the dark, will not take on dangerous tasks, for fear of humiliating his parents. While parents are alive, do not allow friends to die. No private property.
The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
Wang Junchong was the Minister of the Chancellery. He wore his official uniform and rode in a carriage. He passed by Huang Gong's wine shop and said to the passengers in the carriage behind him, "I used to drink with Ji Shuye and Ruan Sizong at this wine shop. We also had a trip to the bamboo forest. Since Ji Shuye died young and Ruan Gong passed away, I have been bound by the times. Although this place seems close today, it seems as far away as mountains and rivers."
When Prime Minister Wang visited Yangzhou, he was greeted by hundreds of guests, all of whom had a favorable look on their faces. There were only a guest named Ren from Linhai and several Hu people with whom he had not yet gotten along. The Duke therefore went to Ren's border and said, "If you leave, there will be no one left in Linhai." Ren was overjoyed. As he passed by a Hu people, he snapped his fingers and said, "Lanjie, Lanjie." All the Hu people laughed, and everyone sitting there was happy.
Zeng Zi asked, 鈥淭he ministers and officials will prepare the corpse for the Duke, and they will receive the funeral rites overnight, but there is mourning in the mourning clothes. What should we do?鈥 Confucius said, 鈥淲hen the corpse is taken out, it should be kept in the palace to wait for the funeral. This is the etiquette.鈥 Confucius said, 鈥淲hen the corpse is taken out with a hat and a crown, the ministers, officials, and scholars should all get out of the way. The corpse must be arranged in a proper manner and must be led in front.鈥 Zixia asked, 鈥淚s it the etiquette that the mourning period of three years is over and there is no need to avoid the funeral rites? Was there a supervisor at the beginning?鈥 Confucius said, 鈥淭he three-year mourning period of the Xia Dynasty was over, and the funeral rites were held after the funeral. The Yin people held the funeral rites after the burial. The Records says, 鈥楢 gentleman does not deprive others of their relatives, and one should not deprive them of their relatives.鈥 Is this what it means?鈥 Zixia said, 鈥淭here is no need to avoid the funeral rites, is it not? Confucius said, "I heard Lao Dan say that Duke Boqin of Lu did it for a purpose. I don't know who is following the benefit of the three-year mourning period now!"
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