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When Pang Shiyuan arrived in Wu, the people of Wu all became friends with him. When he saw Lu Ji, Gu Shao and Quan Cong, he compared them and said, "What Lu Zi said about a slow horse is that it has the advantage of being fast. What Gu Zi said about a slow ox is that it can carry heavy loads and travel far." Someone asked, "If what you said is true, is Lu the better one?" He replied, "Although a slow horse is agile and swift, it can only catch up to one person. A slow ox can travel a hundred miles in a day, but how can it catch up to one person?" The people of Wu did not object. "Quan Zi likes to have a good reputation, just like Fan Zizhao of Runan."
Confucians do not fall in poverty, do not bend in wealth, do not be ashamed of the king, do not burden the elders, and do not pity the officials, so they are called Confucians. Nowadays, people call them Confucians, which is absurd, and often criticize each other as Confucians. "
The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
When Fan Xuan was eight years old, he was picking vegetables in the back garden and accidentally injured his finger and started crying loudly. Someone asked, "Are you in pain?" He replied, "It's not pain, I just dare not damage my body or hair, that's why I'm crying!" Xuan Jie was a frugal person, so when Han Yuzhang gave him a hundred pieces of silk, he refused to accept them. He reduced the amount by fifty pieces, but still refused to accept it. In this way, he reduced it by half, until it reached one horse, but he never accepted it again. The Queen of Han was riding in the same carriage with Fan. The Queen cut two feet of flesh in the carriage and gave it to Fan, saying, "Would anyone rather let his wife be without a scarf?" Fan laughed and accepted it.
If it is abolished, there will be chaos. Therefore, if the ritual of marriage is abolished, the relationship between husband and wife will be difficult, and there will be many crimes of adultery and perversion. If the ritual of drinking in the village is abolished, the order of seniority will be lost, and there will be many cases of fighting. If the ritual of funeral and sacrifice is abolished, the grace of ministers will be weak, and there will be many people who forget their lives. If the ritual of marriage is abolished, the position of the monarch and the minister will be lost, the princes will do evil, and the failure of rebellion and aggression will arise.
Zixia asked the Master, "Live in the funeral of your mother and wife." "Live, talk, eat and drink."
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