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Zilu said, "I heard from the Master that in funeral rituals, it is better to have more mourning than not mourning. In sacrificial rituals, it is better to have more respect than not respect."
Han Kangbo and Xie Xuan did not have a deep relationship. After Xuan's expedition to the north, people on the street suspected that he would not be able to recover. Kang Bo said, "This man loves fame, so he must be good at fighting." Xuan was very angry when he heard this, and often said in front of the crowd with a stern face, "A man who leads a thousand soldiers into a deadly situation to serve his lord and parents should not talk about fame anymore."
Hua Xin treated his sons and daughters very strictly. Even in a quiet room, he was as strict as if they were in the court. The brothers Chen Yuanfang indulged in tenderness and love, and the two families did not deviate from the track of Yongxi.
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
After Huan Xuan usurped the throne, he was about to set up a direct office and asked his attendants, "Where should the Huben Zhonglang Office be located?" Someone answered, "There is no office." This was extremely against the emperor's will at the time. I asked, "How do you know there is none?" He answered, "Pan Yue wrote in his Autumn Poem, 'I am also the General of the Tiger Guards, and I am in charge of the Ministry of Cavalry.' Xuan Zi praised it.
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
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