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A gentleman knows the reasons why teaching is flourishing and the reasons why teaching is abolished, and then he can be a teacher. Therefore, the gentleman's teaching is to guide but not to force, to force but not to suppress, and to open but not to reach. If you follow the way but don't force it, you will be harmonious; if you are strong but don't suppress it, you will be easy; if you open but don't reach it, you will think; harmony and ease with thinking can be called good metaphor.
Meng Wannian and his younger brother were orphaned at a young age and lived in Yangxin County, Wuchang. Wannian traveled around and was famous in his time, but he was orphaned and had never left the house. People in the capital wanted to see him, so they sent a letter to the orphan, saying, "My brother is seriously ill." Arrived in the capital in a panic. All the wise men of the time who saw him sighed and said to each other, "If a young orphan is like this, he will die in ten thousand years."
When following the teacher, I will not cross the road to talk to others. When I met the teacher on the road, I walked towards him, stood upright and bowed. If the teacher talks to him, he will respond; if the teacher doesn't talk to him, he will retreat.
Xu Yun was executed by King Jing of Jin, and his disciple went in to tell his wife. The woman was working on the loom, her expression unchanged, and she said, "I knew it early!" The servants wanted to hide the child, but the woman said, "Don't get involved in the child's affairs." Later, the child was moved to a tomb, and King Jing sent Zhong Hui to look after him. If the child had talent like his father, he would be taken in. The child asked his mother for advice. The mother said: "Although you are good, you don't have much talent. Just speak from your heart and you will have nothing to worry about. You don't have to be too sad. Just stop when you can. You can also ask less about court affairs." The children followed her advice. He then reported the case and was finally released.
The betrothal gift is seven intermediaries for the upper duke, five intermediaries for the marquis and earl, and three intermediaries for the viscount and the man, so as to distinguish the noble from the humble. When introducing and conveying orders, a gentleman dares not question the one he respects, which is the utmost respect. After three concessions, he can convey the order, enter the temple gate after three concessions, reach the steps after three bows, and ascend after three concessions, so as to show respect and humility.
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