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When consulting an elder, one must hold a stick and follow his lead. It is impolite to answer an elder's question without declining.
When Gu Changkang returned from Kuaiji, someone asked him about the beauty of the mountains and rivers. Gu said, "Thousands of rocks compete for beauty, thousands of valleys compete for streams, and the vegetation covers them, like clouds and bright clouds."
Gu He first worked as an official in Yangzhou. It was the first day of the lunar calendar. Before dawn, he parked his car outside the city gate. The Marquis of Zhou went to see the Prime Minister, and sat beside the carriage. And looking for lice, he remained motionless. After Zhou had passed by, he returned and pointed to Gu Xin and asked, "What is there in this place?" Gu was still scratching his lice. Xu Ying said, "This is the most unfathomable place." After Zhou Hou entered, he said to the Prime Minister, "There is a talented person among the officials in your state."
When meeting people, he should not remove mourning clothes, even when he goes to the court of the king. Only the government has to pay taxes and wear mourning clothes. It is said: "A gentleman should not take away people's mourning clothes, nor should he take away their mourning clothes." It is said: "If there are many crimes, the punishment should be five times, and if there are many mourning clothes, the mourning clothes should be five times, and the upper and lower should be attached to each other."
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
Xie Gong said to Xiao Bo: "Your ancestors were comparable to Liu Yin, so they were able to catch up." Xiao Bo said: "It's not that Liu Yin couldn't catch up, it's just that he didn't catch up."
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