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The Duke said, “Why don’t gentlemen today practice this?” Confucius said, “Gentlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.”
He Pingshu had a handsome appearance and a very fair face; Emperor Ming of Wei suspected that he was wearing too much powder. In the middle of summer, eat hot soup noodles. After eating, he broke out in a sweat and wiped himself with his red clothes, and his complexion became brighter.
When Ying Zhennan was appointed as the governor of Jingzhou, Wang Xiuzai and Qiao Wang Ziwuji went to Xinting together to say goodbye. There were many guests sitting there, and they did not realize that both of them had arrived. A guest said, "The disaster caused by Qiao Wangcheng was not the general's intention, but Pingnan's doing." Wuji took the sword from the direct soldier and wanted to chop him. Xiu Zai tried to jump into the water, but was rescued by someone on the boat.
When serving food to elders, if the host serves the food personally, then one should bow before eating; if the host does not serve the food personally, then one should eat without bowing.
You won’t feel full if you eat together, and you won’t get your hands wet if you eat together. Do not knead the rice, do not let the rice fall, do not drink it out of the water, do not chew the food, do not gnaw the bones, do not eat fish or meat, and do not throw bones to dogs. Do not hold on to what you have gained, and do not show off your food. Do not use chopsticks to eat rice and millet. Do not spit on the soup, do not make the soup gurgling, do not prick your teeth, and do not swallow fishy food. The guest was eating soup, but the host could not accept it. The guest drank the meat, and the host declined. Moist meat is chewy, but dry meat is not chewy. Do not suck or roast.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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