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Fan Qi and Yan wrote a guest letter: "Zi Jing raises his body without any mercy, and his skin has no residual moisture." Yan replied: "There is no residual moisture in lifting the body, how can the body be not real?"
If the person who attends the funeral is not the host, the host will bow to the guest and see off the guest. The person who attends the funeral, from the Qisui and below, enters the left courtyard and faces north, cries until he is exhausted, takes off the mourning robe in the east of the order, takes the seat and bares the body, cries and dances with the host. Cry again and cry for the third time, and if there is a guest, the host bows to the guest and sees him off. The husband and wife treat each other as if they were crying morning and night, and their position does not change.
Guo Huai was the governor of Guanzhong. He was very popular among the people and also had many military achievements. Huai's wife was the sister of Grand Commandant Wang Ling, and she should be executed together with Wang Ling for the crime. The envoy's call is very urgent, and the Huai envoy should pack up and set out soon. The civil and military officials of the prefecture as well as the common people urged Huai to raise an army, but Huai refused. When the time came, he sent his wife away, and tens of thousands of people cried and shouted. After walking for dozens of miles, Huai ordered his men to chase the lady back, and then all the civil and military officials rushed forward as if they were protecting their own lives. When he arrived, Huai wrote to Emperor Xuan, saying: "The five sons are in sorrow and miss their mother. If their mother dies, there will be no five sons. If the five sons die, there will be no Huai either." Emperor Xuan responded with a letter and specifically pardoned Huai's wife.
The sacrifice to the king's father is called Huangzukao, and the king's mother is called Huangzubi. The father is called Huangkao, and the mother is called Huangbi. The husband is called Huangbi. When alive, they are called father, mother, and wife. When dead, they are called father, mother-in-law, and concubine.
Zixia said: "The parents of the people have been heard, and I dare to ask what the 'five ultimates' are?" Confucius said: "Where the will reaches, poetry also reaches. Where poetry reaches, ritual also reaches. Where ritual reaches, music also reaches. Where music reaches, sorrow also reaches. Sorrow and joy are born from each other. Therefore, if you look at it with your eyes straight, you can't see it; if you listen to it with your ears attentively, you can't hear it; the will fills the heaven and the earth, this is called the five ultimates. ”
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
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