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When Chen Yuanfang lost his father, he cried and mourned until his body became emaciated. His mother felt sorry for him and secretly covered him with a brocade quilt. Guo Linzong came to express his condolences and saw him, and said to him, "You are a talented person in the country, and a role model for the whole country. How can you mourn with a brocade quilt covering you? Confucius said, 'To wear brocade and to eat rice, what good will it do you?' I will not accept it!" He threw away his clothes and left. From then on, no guests came for a hundred days.
Chen Zhongju of Runan and Li Yuanli of Yingchuan discussed their merits and virtues together, but could not decide who was ahead in order. Cai Bojie commented on them, saying: "Chen Zhongju is good at offending superiors, while Li Yuanli is strict in controlling his subordinates. It is difficult to offend superiors, but easy to control subordinates." Zhongju was thus ranked below the three gentlemen, and Yuanli was ranked above the eight talented people.
He Cidao went to the Prime Minister's place. The Prime Minister pointed at the seat with his whisk and called He to sit with him, saying, "Come! Come! This is your seat."
The so-called self-cultivation is to regulate one's family. One should avoid what one loves, avoid what one despises, avoid what one fears, avoid what one pities, and avoid what one is lazy about. Therefore, there are few people in the world who know the evil of what one likes and the beauty of what one hates. Therefore, there is a proverb: "No one knows the evil of his son, and no one knows the greatness of his seedling. "This means that if you do not cultivate yourself, you cannot manage your family.
Zhang Xuan and Wang Jianwu did not know each other at first, but later they met at Fan Yuzhang's request, and Fan asked them to talk. Zhang Yin was sitting upright with his clothes folded in front of him. Wang Shu looked at him for a long time but could not make any comment. Zhang was greatly disappointed and left. Fan tried to persuade him to stay, but he refused to stay. Fan was Wang's uncle, so he said to Wang: "Zhang Xuan is the most outstanding scholar in Wu. He was also well-known at the time. But he was brought to this point. It is beyond comprehension." Wang laughed and said: "If Zhang Zuxi wants to make his acquaintance, he should come to see him." Fan rushed to inform Zhang, who then packed his belt and went to see him. Then they raised their cups and talked to each other, neither the host nor the guest looked ashamed.
Emperor Xiaowu was very close to and respectful of Wang Guobao and Wang Ya. Ya recommended Wang Xun to the emperor, and the emperor wanted to meet him. Once at night, when he was talking with Guo Bao and Ya, the emperor felt a little drunk and lustful, so he ordered Xun to be called. When he was about to arrive, he heard the soldiers' message. Guo Bao knew that he was inferior to Wang Xun in talent and was afraid of losing his favor, so he said, "Wang Xun is a famous person today. Your Majesty should not see him with wine and women. You can issue another edict." The emperor agreed with his words and thought he was loyal, so he did not see Xun.
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
The etiquette of drinking in the village: those who are sixty sit, and those who are fifty stand and wait to listen to government affairs, so as to show respect for the elders. Those who are sixty have three beans, those who are seventy have four beans, those who are eighty have five beans, and those who are ninety have six beans, so as to show the care for the elderly. When the people know how to respect the elders and care for the elderly, they can then enter filial piety and brotherhood. When the people enter filial piety and brotherhood, they respect the elders and care for the elderly, and then the teaching is established. After the teaching is established, the country can be at peace. What a gentleman calls filial piety is not to see it every day when you come home; to gather the people in the village to shoot, teach them the etiquette of drinking in the village, and then the behavior of filial piety and brotherhood will be established.
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