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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
The Wei Dynasty appointed King Wen of Jin as Duke and prepared nine gifts, but King Wen refused to accept them. The ministers, generals and officers should go to the government office to give instructions. Sikong Zheng Chongchi sent a letter to Ruan Ji asking for literature. At that time, Ji was at Yuan Xiaoni's house. He was helped up from a drunken stupor and wrote a letter, but without any final word, he just wrote it and gave it to the messenger. People at that time thought it was a magic pen.
When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
Therefore, in ancient times, the emperor selected princes, ministers, officials, and scholars by archery. Archery is a man's business, and therefore it is decorated with rituals and music. According to the history, if you can do it well, there is nothing better than archery to establish virtue, so the sage kings are committed to it.
When Xie Renzu was eight years old, Xie Yuzhang was about to see off a guest. At that time, he had already attained enlightenment from his words and entered the upper stream. Everyone sighed and said, "He is the younger Yan Hui sitting here." King Renzu said, "Without Ni Fu sitting here, how can we distinguish Yan Hui?"
After Ren Kai lost his power, he no longer disciplined himself. Someone asked He Qiao, "Why did you sit by and watch Yuan Pei fail without helping?" He said, "Yuan Pei is like Beixia Gate, which is about to fall apart. It cannot be supported by a single piece of wood."
After Emperor Yuan ascended the throne, because of the favor of Queen Zheng, he wanted to abandon Emperor Ming and enthrone Emperor Jianwen. Those who discussed the issue at that time all said, "It is not only against reason and ethics to abandon the elder and establish the younger one as the crown prince, but also because Emperor Ming is intelligent and decisive, he should be the crown prince." The officials of Zhou and Wang all argued earnestly. Only Diao Xuanliang wanted to obey the young master and follow the emperor's orders. Emperor Yuan was about to implement it, but was worried that the officials would not obey his orders. So he first summoned Marquis Zhou and the Prime Minister, and then wanted to issue an edict to Diao. When Zhou and Wang had just entered and reached the top of the steps, the emperor sent someone to convey the imperial edict and stopped the envoys from going to the east wing. The Marquis of Zhou did not realize what was happening, and immediately went down the stairs. The prime minister opened the imperial edict and went straight to the emperor's bed and said, "I don't know why Your Majesty sees me." The emperor remained silent, took out the yellow paper edict from his arms, tore it up and threw it at him. From then on, the crown prince was decided. Zhou Houfang sighed with shame and said, "I always said I was better than Maohong, but now I know I am not as good as him!"
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