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The husband of the mother and the wife of the uncle, the two wives mourn for each other, but the gentleman did not mention it. Some say that they cook together.
When Xie Gong's fellow disciples gathered together, he asked Mao which line of poetry was the best? E Cheng said, "When I went there in the past, the willows were swaying; when I come back now, it is raining and snowing." The Duke said, "The destiny is determined by careful planning, and the distant plans are announced in due course." He said that this sentence has the profound meaning of an elegant person.
During the three-year mourning period, one should not speak or answer questions. Lu means in the white room, one should not sit with others. In the white room, one should not enter unless it is the right time to see the mother. The elderly should live in the white room and not in the white room. Lu means strict. Wife should be treated as uncles and aunts, aunts and sisters as brothers, and the eldest, middle and youngest as adults. The mourning period for relatives is exempted, and the mourning period for brothers is exempted. The mother and wife of the king should be treated as brothers. Those who show their color should not eat or drink. Apart from the mourning period, when walking on the road, one should be surprised when seeing someone, and surprised when hearing someone’s name. When visiting the deceased or asking about his illness, one’s color and expression must be different from others. Only after this can one observe the three-year mourning period. The rest should be done in a straightforward manner.
The way of the university is to manifest the bright virtue, to be close to the people, and to stop at the highest good. Knowing the stop will lead to determination, determination will lead to tranquility, tranquility will lead to peace, peace will lead to consideration, and consideration will lead to success. Things have their roots and ends, and things have their beginnings and ends. Knowing what comes first and what comes later will lead to the way.
A gentleman knows the difficulty and ease of learning, and knows its beauty and ugliness, and then he can make extensive metaphors; if he can make extensive metaphors, he can be a teacher; if he can be a teacher, he can be a leader; if he can be a leader, he can be a king. Therefore, a teacher is for learning to be a king. Therefore, choosing a teacher must be careful. "Records" said: "Three kings and four generations only have their teachers." Is this what it means!
Grand Tutor Xie asked the chief clerk Lu Tui, "Why did Zhang Ping write a eulogy for his mother but not for his father?" Tui replied, "It is because a man's virtue is shown in his deeds, and a woman's beauty cannot be revealed without a eulogy."
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