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When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
Wang and Liu were together in the south of Hangzhou, and had a feast at Huanzi's home. Xie Zhenxi went to the Shangshu's tomb and returned, and cried again three days after the burial. Everyone wanted to take him back, so they first sent a letter, but he still did not agree, but he had already stopped the car. It’s important, so I’ll go back. Everyone met him outside the door, took his arm and went down, and was able to take off his cap and hat. Halfway through the feast, I realized I was still feeling tired.
When the senior officials meet the king, the king shall bow to him. When the scholars meet the senior officials, the senior officials shall bow to him. When the same country meets for the first time, the host shall bow to him. The king shall not return the bow to the scholars; if they are not his subjects, they shall return the bow. The ministers, even if they are lowly, must return the greetings.
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
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