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Do not talk about music in mourning, do not talk about bad things during sacrifices, and do not talk about women in public courts.
The Duke of Zhou was defeated in Jingzhou and returned without being employed. Prime Minister Wang wrote to someone, "How can such a noble and magnanimous person be left behind?"
When the emperor is about to go to war, he will be like the god, be suitable for the altar, make sacrifices to the gods, and worship the gods in the places he will conquer. He receives orders from his ancestors and is accomplished in school. When he goes to war, he arrests the guilty; when he returns, he offers sacrifices to the school and reports the results of the investigation.
After Su Zigao's incident was settled, Lords Wang and Yu wanted to appoint Kong Tingwei as the governor of Danyang. After the chaos, the people were in poverty. Kong said with a sigh, "When Emperor Suzong was dying, you all personally ascended the imperial bed and were recognized by him, and followed his will. I am a distant and lowly person, and I am not among those who were there to take charge of the affairs of the state. When times were tough, you put me first. Now I am just rotten meat on the table, waiting to be chopped up by anyone!" Then he left, and the other gentlemen also stopped.
When Kang Sengyuan first crossed the river, no one knew him, so he kept going around the markets begging for money to support himself. Suddenly he went to Yinyuan's Xu, where there were guests. Yin asked him to sit down and chatted with him, and then talked about morality. I have never been ashamed of my words and expressions. Get a rough idea and go to visit. From this I know it.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Nanyang Zong Shilin was a contemporary of Wei Wu, but Wei Wu despised him as a person and did not associate with him. When Wei Wu became Sikong and was in charge of government affairs, he calmly asked Zong, "Can I befriend you?" Zong replied, "The ambition of pine and cypress still remains." Shi Lin was dismissed for disobeying the emperor's order, and his position was not worthy of his virtue. Whenever Emperor Wen's brothers visited his door, they would bow alone under the bed. This was their etiquette for greeting.
Xun Xu once ate bamboo shoots and served rice on the seat of Emperor Wu of Jin, and said to the people sitting there, "This is the result of hard work in cooking with firewood." The people sitting there did not believe him, so they sent someone to inquire about it secretly, and found out that it was actually done with the carriage legs.
Guo Zigao said, "Burial means hiding; hiding means that people cannot see it. Therefore, clothes are enough to decorate the body, the coffin is surrounded by clothes, the outer coffin is surrounded by coffin, and the earth is surrounded by the outer coffin; turn the soil and plant trees."
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