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In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
The Master said: "Ritual is reason; music is moderation. A gentleman does not move without reason, and does not act without moderation. If he cannot read poetry, he is wrong in etiquette; if he cannot play music, he is simple in etiquette; if he is weak in virtue, he is empty in etiquette. "The Master said, "The system is in the rites, the culture is in the rites, and the practice is up to the people!" Zigong crossed the table and replied, "May I ask: Is Kui poor?" The Master said, "Ancient people? Ancient people. Those who are good at rites but not music are called simple; those who are good at music but not rites are called partial. Kui was good at music but not rites, so he passed down this name. He was an ancient person."
Guan Ning and Hua Xin were weeding in the garden together when they saw a piece of gold on the ground. Guan swung his hoe and it looked like a piece of tile or stone, but Hua picked it up and threw it away. They once sat together reading, and someone passed by in a carriage and official robes. Ning continued reading as usual, but Xin put down his book and went out to look. Ning cut the mat and sat on the other side, saying, "You are not my friend."
Someone asked: "Why do those who wear a cap not bare their flesh?" The answer is: The cap is the highest honor, and it is not suitable for the body to bare flesh, so it is replaced by stripping.
Wang Sizhou first served as a military officer in the record room of Yu Gong, and later he appointed Yin Hao as the chief secretary. When they first arrived, Duke Yu wanted to send the king to the capital. The king asked to stay, saying: "I have never seen such a virtuous person. I have just arrived, but I am still greedy to stay with you for a few days."
Prime Minister Wang appointed Wang Lantian as his assistant. Yu Gong asked the Prime Minister, "What is Lantian like?" Wang said, "He is truly simple and noble, no less than his father and grandfather; but he is aloof and simple, so he is not as good as you."
Confucius said: "The Way is not far from people. If people practice the Way and distance themselves from others, they cannot be considered the Way. The Book of Songs says: 'Cut the wood, chop the wood, its principle is not far away.' Holding a stick to chop wood, looking at it from a distance, it still seems far away. Therefore, a gentleman governs people by their own way, and stops when he changes. Loyalty and forgiveness are not far from the Way. If you do not want to do it yourself, do not do it to others. There are four ways of a gentleman, and I have not been able to do any of them. What I ask of my son is to serve my father, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my minister is to serve my king, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my younger brother is to serve my elder brother, but I have not been able to do it; what I ask of my friends is to give them first, but I have not been able to do it. The actions of a mediocre person are cautious; if there is something that is lacking, he dare not not try hard, and if there is something that is more than enough, he dare not use it all; if he speaks, he will act accordingly, and if he acts, he will act accordingly. Why does a gentleman not have to be frank!"
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