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When marrying a woman to the emperor, it is said to prepare the people; to the king, it is said to prepare wine and liquor; to the minister, it is said to prepare sweeping.
Someone went to see General Wang, and met Anfeng, the general, and the prime minister sitting there; he went to another room to see Ji Yin and Pingzi. When he returned, he said to others, "Today's trip has seen a dazzling array of pearls and jades."
Wang Youjun asked Xu Xuandu: "How do you compare to Anshi?" Xu did not answer, so Wang said: "Anshi was a great prime minister, so should Awan split his eyes to compete with him?"
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
Even if there are delicious dishes, if you don't eat them, you don't know their taste; even if there are the ultimate truth, if you don't learn it, you don't know its goodness. Therefore, only after learning can you know your shortcomings, and only after teaching can you know your difficulties. Knowing your shortcomings, you can reflect on yourself; knowing your difficulties, you can strengthen yourself. Therefore, it is said that teaching and learning complement each other. "The Book of Changes" says: "Learning is half done." Is this what it means!
When Chen Yuanfang was eleven years old, he waited for Yuan Gong. Yuan Gong asked, "Your lord is a virtuous man in Taiqiu, and people far and near praise him. What do you do?" Yuan Fang said, "My old father is in Taiqiu. He comforts the strong with virtue and the weak with kindness. He lets them do whatever they want, and they become more respected over time." Yuan Gong said, "I used to be the magistrate of Ye, and I did just that. I wonder if your lord follows my example or if I follow your father?" Yuan Fang said, "Duke Zhou and Confucius were born in different eras, but they were the same everywhere. Duke Zhou did not learn from Confucius, and Confucius did not learn from Duke Zhou."
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