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Duke Huan said in his bed, "If I stay like this, I will be laughed at by Wen and Jing!" Then he sat up and said, "Since I cannot leave a good reputation for future generations, I am not worthy of being infamous for eternity, am I?"
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Xiang Xiong was the chief clerk of Henei. There were official matters that were not as good as his, and the prefect Liu Huai was furious, so he beat Xiang Xiong and sent him away. Later, Xiong became a Huangmen Lang and Liu became a Shizhong, but they did not speak to each other at first. When Emperor Wu heard this, he ordered Xiong to restore the friendship between the monarch and his subject. Xiong had no choice but to go to Liu, kowtowed twice and said, "I came here in response to the imperial edict, but now the friendship between the monarch and his subject is broken. What do you think?" Then he left. When Emperor Wu heard that there was still discord, he angrily asked Xiong, "I asked you to restore the friendship between monarch and subject. Why did you break it off?" Xiong said, "The gentlemen of the ancient times promoted others with courtesy and dismissed others with courtesy. The gentlemen of today promote others as if they were putting them on their knees and dismiss them as if they were throwing them into the abyss. I am fortunate enough not to be a leader of the army in Liuhe. How can I restore the friendship between monarch and subject?" Emperor Wu agreed.
In the court, talk about etiquette, and answer with etiquette when asked about etiquette. At the grand feast, do not ask for divination, and do not be extravagant.
When He Yan was seven years old, he was as bright and wise as a god, and Wei Wu loved him very much. Because Yan was in the palace, he wanted to adopt him as his son. Yan then drew a circle on the ground and placed himself in the middle of it. People asked why? He replied, "It is the He family's house." When Wei Wu knew about it, he sent him back.
Jia Chong's wife, Li, wrote a set of instructions for girls, which were circulated in the world. The daughter of Li, the wife of King Xian of Qi, and the daughter of Guo, the empress of Emperor Hui. After Chong died, Li and Guo's daughters each wanted to be buried together with their mother, but they could not decide for years. After Empress Jia was deposed, Lady Li was enshrined in the royal family and the burial was decided.
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