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An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
Emperor Ming asked Zhou Boren: "How do you think you compare to Xi Jian?" Zhou said: "Jian is a good minister, if he has the ability." He asked Xi again. Xi said: "Zhou Xi is comparable to me, and has the style of a great scholar."
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The dukes have wives, wives, wives, and concubines. The lady calls herself the old woman to the emperor; she calls herself the widowed young monarch to the princes; she calls herself the little boy to her monarch. From the wives below, they call themselves the maid. The son calls himself the name to his parents.
Grand Tutor Xie asked his sons and nephews, "Why do you want to make them good when you are involved in other people's affairs?" No one said anything. The charioteer answered, "It's like wanting orchids and jade trees to grow in the courtyard."
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